The EPIC WIN Thread 3: SON OF EPIC

Just won a beauty and cosmetic basket worth 300$ from Shoppers! I never win anything!
"I never win anything!"

LIES! ALL LIES! I demand an immediate and total recanting of this statement!

You won Nicks heart. You won the fight to not buckle under and let life keep you down. You won us over to your side.

You've won far more that you are willing to admit, and will win more as you learn to see what the true battles and prizes are in this life.
 
I now know what I want to do with my future....I want to either work in a funeral home or a morgue.
I know that seems weird but I'm not squeemish and it interests me lol
There's nothing wrong with it at all, it just becomes harder to talk about what you do for a living because it makes other people squeamish.

--Patrick
 

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Staff member
When I was in college, a local funeral home advertised in the student center for night staff. The flyer would go up (pre-WWW proliferation), and someone would take the job. A few weeks later, the flyer would be back up.
 
When I was in college, a local funeral home advertised in the student center for night staff. The flyer would go up (pre-WWW proliferation), and someone would take the job. A few weeks later, the flyer would be back up.
I feel like there could be some stories there.

--Patrick
 

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Staff member
I know the reason, but I left it mysterious because the real reason is boring. My roommate took the job once, and also quit. The real reason is trying to stay awake all night in a place that is literally dead, and attending classes the next day doesn't really work.
 
I know the reason, but I left it mysterious because the real reason is boring. My roommate took the job once, and also quit. The real reason is trying to stay awake all night in a place that is literally dead, and attending classes the next day doesn't really work.
Pfft. I was a night security guard in a bunch of empty warehouses for part of my college career. Perfectly possible; you just have to learn how to function on 2x 3h of sleep a day or similar. And by "empty warehouse" I mean, literally, an empty warehouse - no occasional passage, no trucks, no cleaning staff - just a clear empty building. I may or may not have taken a laptop to work and seen a lot of shows there. And/or typed out most of my master's thesis. And/or read a whole bunch of books for my studies. Such work doesn't require a whole lot of attention. Plenty of time to do intelligent stuff you'd have to do anyway.
 
I now know what I want to do with my future....I want to either work in a funeral home or a morgue.
I know that seems weird but I'm not squeemish and it interests me lol
My grandfather, and later my dad, was the president of our church's outside board which meant he had all of the cemetery information. When someone died, he had the map of where the plots were and who owned them, would call the diggers, and spoke to both the family and funeral home. One funeral home in particular was run by a family and they were some of the nicest people you'd ever meet. I really think that knowing them is why I got over my fear of death.[DOUBLEPOST=1442339155,1442339125][/DOUBLEPOST]
I worked a 12hr shift at 3M as an undergrad. 12am-12pm Fri and Sat. I have literally fallen asleep standing up.
I did that while working in the casino. Midnight shifts ftw!
 
The hometown of my wife's family has one funeral home, it's been run by one family since it was established. The current head of the business is named, and I'm not kidding, Squeaky.
 
I now know what I want to do with my future....I want to either work in a funeral home or a morgue.
I know that seems weird but I'm not squeemish and it interests me lol
From a Fraizer cold open: "...While it may seem compulsive that your husband washes his hands sixty-four times a day, do remember that he is a mortician."
 
Spawn #2 whining and complaining for 1 whole hour about life and me in particular before asking "What's for dinner?"

Me looking up from cleaning the house "A great big serving of minimal effort that's what."
 
Spawn #2 whining and complaining for 1 whole hour about life and me in particular before asking "What's for dinner?"

Me looking up from cleaning the house "A great big serving of minimal effort that's what."
Oh fuck me this was supposed to be in the rant thread.
 
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