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  6. Welcome to Halforums!

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GasBandit
Last Activity:
Nov 19, 2017 at 11:39 PM
Joined:
Nov 27, 2008
Messages:
51,152
Trophy Points:
1,844
Media:
21
Albums:
1
Positive ratings received:
46,495
Neutral ratings received:
1,304
Negative ratings received:
185

Post Ratings

Received: Given:
Like 15,387 1,340
Disagree 270 39
Hugs 2,303 209
LOVE IT!! 3,264 23
Funny 16,476 218
Pun 405 136
Informative 3,216 226
I get that reference. 955 209
I need this explained to me. 179 7
Needs a lock! 172 11
Brofist 4,894 331
Spoiler! 275 17
You're doing the thing again. 175 49
Gender:
Male
Birthday:
Jan 24, 1979 (Age: 38)
Home Page:
Location:
Yeehawbutts, Texas
Occupation:
Retired supervillain

GasBandit

Ask me about my Reprehensible Filth, Male, 38, from Yeehawbutts, Texas

Staff Member

If animals didn't want to be eaten, why are they made out of food. Nov 14, 2017 at 4:08 PM

GasBandit was last seen:
Nov 19, 2017 at 11:39 PM
    1. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If animals didn't want to be eaten, why are they made out of food.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Because making out of the food food eats would also make them much, much slower.
        Nov 14, 2017 at 7:38 PM
    2. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      It annoys me that the lowest magnitude numbered street in my town is 15th street. Doesn't that really make 15th street... 1st street?
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        No, it means they could only come up with 14 clever street names.
        Nov 3, 2017
    3. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Whose IQ is higher, a Hanzo Main, or a Rick and Morty fan?
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Statistically? I'm guessing the R&M fan. Just remember that IQ is only a measure of INT, not WIS.
        Oct 31, 2017
    4. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Being a solid 3.5 with a thing for 10s is rough.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Just find one 10 and then go into it almost 3 whole times.
        Oct 26, 2017
    5. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Karma means I can do bad things to people all day long and rest easy in the knowledge they deserve it.
    6. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Being an adult is easy. You just feel tired all the time and tell people about how tired you are and they tell you THEY are tired as well.
      1. blotsfan
        blotsfan
        Then take a nap.

        THEN FIRE ZE MISSILES!
        Oct 4, 2017
        PatrThom likes this.
      2. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Then you tell them about how you stayed up until 3:30a the previous night dicking around on the Internet.
        Oct 5, 2017
    7. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Every mother teaches their son to mansplain from day one by pretending not to know. And then they grow up and get griped at for it.
      1. Zero Esc
        Zero Esc
        ???
        Aug 5, 2017
        PatrThom likes this.
    8. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Why does Norway paint barcodes on their warships? So when they all return to port, they can SCANDINAVIAN
      1. Bubble181 likes this.
      2. Emrys
        Emrys
        No. Just... no.
        Aug 1, 2017
    9. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      "Dependence begets subservience and venality, suffocates the germ of virtue, and prepares fit tools for the designs of ambition." Jefferson
    10. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      You ever notice how unburned CD-Rs smell like celery?
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        No.
        Jul 14, 2017
    11. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      We went a walking in the dark, goosing statues in the park, and honey, if Sherman's Horse can take it, so can you.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        ...and reminisciiiiiiiiiing
        Jul 12, 2017
    12. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      I bet the first guy to hear a parrot talk freaked right the hell out and was afraid to tell anybody.
    13. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Horror movies with jump scares are like stand up comedians who tickle people instead of telling jokes. "You laughed! Technically I'm funny!"
    14. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Why is Monday so far from Friday but Friday is so close to Monday.
    15. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Picking your nose doesn't make you a bad person, it's what you do next that determines your character.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        What kind of person are you if you put it back?
        Jun 23, 2017
    16. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      There's no longer such things as unacceptable behavior, just unacceptable victims.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        What we need now are standards on what constitutes unacceptable victim behavior.
        Jun 12, 2017
    17. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Most adult friendships are just figuring out whose turn it is to cancel plans.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Sometimes it's more about whose turn it is to forget to plan any plans in the first place.
        Jun 12, 2017
    18. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Where do I register to become a sex offender?
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        PLEASE tell me there is a Yahoo! Answers thread for this.
        Jun 7, 2017
        Denbrought likes this.
    19. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Pollen count's so high, the meth heads are trying to convert it back into sudafed.
    20. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      I was Bart's age when the Simpsons launched (not counting Tracy Ullman). They're still on the air, and I'm now Homer's age, and I envy him.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Don't. The weirdest stuff always seems to happen to that guy. And his family. And his town. Also I was in college by the time even the Tracy Ullman ones came out.
        May 31, 2017
    21. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      There's never enough time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over, somehow.
    22. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Remember, kids, you can't spell "advertisements" without semen between the tits.
      1. Bubble181 likes this.
    23. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      My career as a karate instructor was tragically curtailed when parents found out I was wholly unqualified & just enjoyed kicking children.
    24. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Postmodernism - is it nihilism for narcissists, or narcissism for nihilists?
    25. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Look out! The anorgasmic are comi- wait, no, false alarm. They're not.
      1. Bubble181 likes this.
    26. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Knowing what a CHA modifier is, is apparently a negative CHA modifier.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        This explains why high CHA folks tend to have low INT.
        Mar 19, 2017
    27. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Why do people get excited for Pi day (3/14)? It's completely irrational.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        I prefer Tau day. It's twice as good.
        Mar 15, 2017
    28. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      I have two settings: "Sleep is for the weak" and "Sleeping for a week."
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Is there a setting for "Sleep-eat your physique?"
        Feb 27, 2017
    29. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If your GF/Wife has a friend you find annoying, simply mention offhandedly at random that the friend is pretty. Problem will solve itself.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        That could backfire, y'know. Best be prepared for either outcome.
        Feb 24, 2017
    30. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Fee Fee Fi Fi Fo Fo Fum, I smell smoke in the au-di-to-ri-um
    31. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Interior crocodile alligator. I drive a Chevrolet movie theater.
      1. mikerc
        mikerc
        "Interior crocodile alligator"? Are you claiming to be an otherkin?!
        Jan 17, 2017
      2. GasBandit
    32. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Make guns illegal! Because it worked so well for drugs, right?
    33. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      One of the difficult things about being single again is trying to find a good reason to shower on days I don't go in to work.
    34. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      You ever just feel like a gooey wad of festering, caustic venom encased in a candy shell of politeness and amiability?
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        No. There have been a few times I've felt like caged vengeance, but not venom.
        Dec 28, 2016
    35. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Every corpse on Everest was once an extremely motivated person. Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        "Even if you don't succeed, you might still serve as a cautionary tale for those who follow."
        Dec 21, 2016
        Null likes this.
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  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    Birthday:
    Jan 24, 1979 (Age: 38)
    Home Page:
    http://www.gasbanditry.com
    Location:
    Yeehawbutts, Texas
    Occupation:
    Retired supervillain
    I'll tell you about the person I met when I was young...

    In 198x, we found the Badd's top secret material for Project Albatross, which was never put into practice. Commander of the Imperial Forces, Generalissimo Killt, had seen the plan and decided to implement it himself.

    The Federation tried to stop him by sending our best soldier, "Super" Joe... but lost contact with him. One brave man was sent with a special mission - to rescue Joe, and complete his mission. The story begins...

    Signature

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