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  5. Welcome to Halforums!

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  6. Welcome to Halforums!

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GasBandit
Last Activity:
Mar 27, 2017 at 1:03 AM
Joined:
Nov 27, 2008
Messages:
46,076
Trophy Points:
1,844
Media:
21
Albums:
1
Positive ratings received:
39,901
Neutral ratings received:
1,093
Negative ratings received:
168

Post Ratings

Received: Given:
Like 13,518 1,086
Disagree 255 29
Hugs 1,877 141
LOVE IT!! 2,806 15
Funny 14,267 178
Pun 341 108
Informative 2,480 165
I get that reference. 711 153
I need this explained to me. 143 5
Needs a lock! 155 6
Brofist 4,242 235
Spoiler! 213 13
You're doing the thing again. 141 44
Gender:
Male
Birthday:
Jan 24, 1979 (Age: 38)
Home Page:
Location:
Yeehawbutts, Texas
Occupation:
Retired supervillain

GasBandit

Ask me about my Reprehensible Filth, Male, 38, from Yeehawbutts, Texas

Staff Member

Knowing what a CHA modifier is, is apparently a negative CHA modifier. Mar 18, 2017

GasBandit was last seen:
Mar 27, 2017 at 1:03 AM
    1. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Knowing what a CHA modifier is, is apparently a negative CHA modifier.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        This explains why high CHA folks tend to have low INT.
        Mar 19, 2017
    2. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Why do people get excited for Pi day (3/14)? It's completely irrational.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        I prefer Tau day. It's twice as good.
        Mar 15, 2017
    3. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      I have two settings: "Sleep is for the weak" and "Sleeping for a week."
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Is there a setting for "Sleep-eat your physique?"
        Feb 27, 2017
    4. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If your GF/Wife has a friend you find annoying, simply mention offhandedly at random that the friend is pretty. Problem will solve itself.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        That could backfire, y'know. Best be prepared for either outcome.
        Feb 24, 2017
    5. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Fee Fee Fi Fi Fo Fo Fum, I smell smoke in the au-di-to-ri-um
    6. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Interior crocodile alligator. I drive a Chevrolet movie theater.
      1. mroosc1979
        mroosc1979
        "Interior crocodile alligator"? Are you claiming to be an otherkin?!
        Jan 17, 2017
      2. GasBandit
    7. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Make guns illegal! Because it worked so well for drugs, right?
    8. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      One of the difficult things about being single again is trying to find a good reason to shower on days I don't go in to work.
    9. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      You ever just feel like a gooey wad of festering, caustic venom encased in a candy shell of politeness and amiability?
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        No. There have been a few times I've felt like caged vengeance, but not venom.
        Dec 28, 2016
    10. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Every corpse on Everest was once an extremely motivated person. Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        "Even if you don't succeed, you might still serve as a cautionary tale for those who follow."
        Dec 21, 2016
        Null likes this.
    11. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      That one rogue hair on your forehead that shows you where your hairline used to be. When it grows out, it's like running into an awkward ex.
    12. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      People my age get so worked up about Star Wars because they've been making payments on it since they were kids but they'll never own it.
      1. Dei likes this.
    13. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      "Don't call me racist until you've tried taking Korean clients to a Japanese restaurant." -Overheard in a Goldman Sachs elevator
      1. stienman likes this.
    14. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      "Political Correctness is fascism pretending to be manners." - George Carlin
      1. PatrThom likes this.
      2. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        This quote is confirmed as "genuine Carlin," unlike many of the other ones out there attributed to him.
        Nov 18, 2016
    15. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Women are like guns - they recoil when I hold them.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Do any of them go off half-cocked?
        Oct 26, 2016
      2. Null
        Null
        If they're recoiling when you hold them, it sounds like there's a problem with an oversensitive trigger causing premature detonation. Girls with oversensitive triggers can be avoided by steering clear of tumblr.
        Oct 26, 2016
    16. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      I don't think people appreciate how much effort I put into not becoming a serial killer.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Right there with you, pal.
        Oct 7, 2016
    17. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If you're not the one paying for something, you're what's being sold. Expect to be treated as their product, not a customer.
    18. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Taylor Swift has 100 songs about guys leaving her and 0 songs about blowjobs. I think we all see correlation here.
    19. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      How many stupid people are alive today because lawn darts were banned in the 80s?
    20. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      It's best not to accept oral sex from someone with a history of uncontrolled seizures.
    21. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Songs I can't sing alone because the backup and lead vocals overlap are a constant source of irritation to me. Wake me up insiCAN'T WAKE UP
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        You must hate singing along to R.E.M.
        May 31, 2016
        Null likes this.
    22. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      We're all just 5 liters of blood sloshing around in a big meaty bag, turning food into poop and trying to fuck a little.
    23. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      You ever notice that supervillains are always the ones trying to change things, and super "heroes" are the ones resisting change?
      1. Null
        Null
        Yes, but changing from "a vibrant civilization" into a "blasted wasteland of nuclear fallout" is not a *positive* change.
        Oct 26, 2016
    24. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      My 98 was 87 on a record, yo. So now I go Bronco.
    25. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      I'm more willing to go to the 12th page of pornhub than the 2nd page of google.
      1. Null, Bubble181 and blotsfan like this.
    26. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Ya haul sixteen tons, and whaddaya get? Another day older and that much closer to murdering coworkers.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        St. Peter don'tcha call me cuz I cain't go.
        I owe my soul to the Devil because I murdered all those coworkers.
        Feb 12, 2016
        Null and GasBandit like this.
    27. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      Sam Axe is my spirit animal.
    28. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If half your waking brain cycles are committed to developing metaphors you MIGHT need someday (or might not), you're my kind of people.
    29. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If you play the "how few times can I touch the brake" game on your daily commute, you're my kind of people.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        You have no idea.
        Jul 23, 2015
    30. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If you are alarmed by your phone battery going under 75%, but don't buy gas until the needle touches the "E", you're my kind of people.
      1. Amy
    31. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If you always have to look in the tissue after you blow your nose, every time, you're my kind of people.
      1. View previous comments...
      2. Amy
        Amy
        WAI. It's either snot, blood, or nose poop!
        Jul 20, 2015
      3. GasBandit
        GasBandit
        Isn't everything, though? The configurations are sometimes informative.
        Jul 20, 2015
      4. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        The color matters at LEAST as much as that of poop.
        Jul 21, 2015
    32. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If your RL woman gets jealous of you when video game NPC women flirt with you, or are even just nice to you, you're my kind of people.
      1. View previous comments...
      2. GasBandit
        GasBandit
        Apparently!
        Jul 20, 2015
      3. Amy
        Amy
        I'LL KILL HER
        Jul 20, 2015
      4. GasBandit
        GasBandit
        Oh I hope not! She's silly at times but I kinda like her.
        Jul 20, 2015
    33. Amy
      Amy
      *hugs*
      1. GasBandit likes this.
    34. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If even the path of least resistance sometimes sounds more trouble than it's worth, you're my kind of people.
    35. GasBandit
      GasBandit
      If you consider "Why Boss Hogg stopped employing a chauffeur" to be one of life's great unsolvable mysteries, you're my kind of people.
      1. PatrThom
        PatrThom
        Because they couldn't understand him?
        Jul 13, 2015
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  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    Birthday:
    Jan 24, 1979 (Age: 38)
    Home Page:
    http://www.gasbanditry.com
    Location:
    Yeehawbutts, Texas
    Occupation:
    Retired supervillain
    I'll tell you about the person I met when I was young...

    In 198x, we found the Badd's top secret material for Project Albatross, which was never put into practice. Commander of the Imperial Forces, Generalissimo Killt, had seen the plan and decided to implement it himself.

    The Federation tried to stop him by sending our best soldier, "Super" Joe... but lost contact with him. One brave man was sent with a special mission - to rescue Joe, and complete his mission. The story begins...
  • You know, today already got off to a rough start. But I was getting it sorted out, and had a handle on it. While I was...
    GasBandit, Dec 22, 2016
    So here we are. It's been three years. What do I say? Am I over it? I don't know. Maybe I never will be completely. But I...
    GasBandit, Nov 29, 2016
    Maybe someday I'll let this day go by unremarked. But I am not quite there yet, this year. I'm bitter, and tempted to put...
    GasBandit, May 16, 2016
    It's the first time I've managed to get any substantial time off from work in 5 or 7 years or so. It's nice, I guess. The...
    GasBandit, Apr 2, 2016
    It just occurred to me that maybe my outlook on marriage is shaped by my family's track record. My mother and father married...
    GasBandit, Dec 8, 2015
    It's all trance stuff. I know I know, trance rots the brain... but, it's really good music to get work done. So here's the...
    GasBandit, Oct 8, 2015
    I am sharp and twisted. I wonder how so many people rise so high when they have no idea what they are doing. I hear the...
    GasBandit, Sep 30, 2015
    [IMG] Total Views: 483,087 Subscribers: 2,748 Total minutes watched: 3,540,683 Likes: 5256 Dislikes: 96 Total ad revenue:...
    GasBandit, Sep 18, 2015
    I've been waiting to die. It sounds melodramatic, but that's the simplest way to put it. Even as I've recovered from the...
    GasBandit, Jul 7, 2015
    It's the second occurrence of your birthday since you passed. Seems like a proper time to look back. It's been a bit of a...
    GasBandit, May 16, 2015
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