[Thread Game] Terrible Video Game Descriptions (MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS)

So, I hooked up with this really hot girl one day, and we get it on, except her dad comes in half way through, so I have to run away from the angry dad. And then I go home and run some errands, but then my dad and my brothers get killed, and I have to run away with my mom and my sister.

And then I start stabbing people.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Some Riddick game?
Escape from butcher bay?[DOUBLEPOST=1375460035][/DOUBLEPOST]
So, I hooked up with this really hot girl one day, and we get it on, except her dad comes in half way through, so I have to run away from the angry dad. And then I go home and run some errands, but then my dad and my brothers get killed, and I have to run away with my mom and my sister.

And then I start stabbing people.
Too easy, Assassin's Creed 2.
 
Kill yourself so that you can live with your daughter.

(put the answer in spoilers, this is a fairly new game)
 
This one will be easy:

Your irresponsible clumsy father destroys the universe. You, suffering from Proportionate Dwarfism, must use your incredible strength to maneuver your portable gravity well around Earth in the hopes of righting his blunder.
 
This one will be easy:

Your irresponsible clumsy father destroys the universe. You, suffering from Proportionate Dwarfism, must use your incredible strength to maneuver your portable gravity well around Earth in the hopes of righting his blunder.
Naaaa na na na na na na naaa na naaa naaa na na naaaaa....

--Patrick
 
You are a hand. A very powerful hand, yes, but a hand nonetheless. You often use your hand to spank a monkey. Or stroke a chicken.
 
Space... the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship En.... HOLY GOD FIRE!!!!MY GOD!!!!!THE FIRE!!!!!ALIENS ARE EATING MY FACE!!!!!!DECOMPRESSION!!!!!!!

KABOOM!
 
In this game you are a kid that goes to work. While working you have to avoid obstacles constantly and if you don't do what your customers want they will fire you leaving you with less points for doing your job
 
In this game you are a kid that goes to work. While working you have to avoid obstacles constantly and if you don't do what your customers want they will fire you leaving you with less points for doing your job
Paperboy.[DOUBLEPOST=1375528537][/DOUBLEPOST]You are a pair of eyes, looking for pieces of an urn. Watch out for bats.
 
I wield a massive sword. I fight against the forces of both order and chaos, on behalf of an extinct race, before a backdrop of global annihilation. One of my companions is a woman who willingly faces death in order to prevent catastrophe. My final battle is against a companion I had thought dead, but in fact was corrupted into seeking the destruction of all life, twisting his form into a perverted parody of an angel.

I am not Cloud Strife.
 
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