Top form, and a class act.
North_Ranger's last gift to the forum - an olive branch extended.
North_Ranger's last gift to the forum - an olive branch extended.
For what it is worth, and I don't mean to bring up the ban debate (especially here) again, but I never thought of you as a bad guy; maybe you disturbed shit when you should've sat back, but who among us, stones, etc, etc.Alright. I never thought in a million years I would care this much. I said what I said earlier, but while mowing the lawn today (yes, I'm aware it's November 29th), this song popped on my iPod:
And it hit me.
I thought it appropriate to share that, yes, I thought of Mikko. This song is for you. I'm truly sorry for everything that transpired between us, my friend. I will miss you, and I regret not telling you this sooner.
Just to clear the air, I'd like to formally apologize to any and all members of the community that I've slighted in the past. The ones that I think I hit hardest before my ban last year (that come to mind at least) are Nick and LittleSin. I doubt I'll hang around here as much as I used to (or if Dave's going to reenact the ban anytime soon), but for what it's worth, well, there it is.
A friend of mine who lives in Finland passed away today, a few hours ago.
Why is this like this? He was happy, he enjoyed living, had fun. He was a teacher, he helped people. He gets cancer, he gets a viral infection, he dies young...
I hate life. I'm miserable. I see emptiness and meaninglessness, I think it's all pointless suffering... but I don't die, I don't get seriously ill.
Why not? Why him, who would have enjoyed continuing to live?
And now what? If I'm right, then he's ... There's nothing left. Oblivion, whatever, he ceases to be. No more pain. In a perverse way I envy that.
And if I'm wrong. There's heaven and hell. If he's not Christian, and Paul goes on about Faith alone, and Jesus says, "and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him," so, what, what? Hell? Hell for him, and eventually hell for me. Wrath of God.
Why is this like this? What is the point?
Sorry for the delay. The reasons are partly medical and partly the struggle I had and sill have how to respond in a way that makes sense and being honest to you and to myself.
I grieve with you over the loss of a friend who had a lot to give and apparently did give. Also the perpetual question: Why him and not me? With the related question: i would have done it differently.
I can speculate forever but it will never be clear of things would be better if my way would have been better. There are umpteen aspects of what happened to your friend and why that will be forever a closed book. And I am convinced that, whatever he believed and whoever he believed in will have been sorted out in his favor. My God is not a bookkeeper or a bean counter. My God has created people to be happy , now and forever, and when it turned out that that in the given circumstances for this person was not possible he solved it by making him happy somewhere else. Oh, I hear the judgments all around: he did not believe we do; he did not acted we expected him to act with his talents, if he he had done this or that it would have turned out differently, etc. Human reasoning. And in your case, a personal friend, who had so much to give, dies unexpectedly, painfully. Was that necessary. I would have done it differently.
I trust that what happened to your friend was the best for him. I even trust that, no matter what all the judges say, that since God has created him to be happy he is happy and sine there so many things I do not know all other considerations and emotions have to be set aside.
Of course I prayed the good God to give me understanding of the why (which I did not get) and for your friend and for you, which I hope is operating, may be slow and without us knowing it (yet). But I will never put the goodness of God on the back burner. Whether I know it or not I am convinced that your friend wants you to be happy and that maybe in due time we will understand some of the why's. In the meantime let us not spoil his happiness by asking questions for which there are at resent no answers and spoil the good memories we have of him. He would want us to use the talents we have to be productive and not waste our time in fruitless speculations.
This my, frien, is the best I can do at the moment. take care
And now I'll address Mathias. When I found out about Mikko I removed the ban and let Mathias know what had happened. He'd known Mikko for years just as we all had, and even though their last interactions weren't always positive, that wasn't always the case. And let's face it, I think we all know now that we're kind of like a family here. There are damned few of you I wouldn't let into my house and those I wouldn't are spammers. But sometimes families fight. And this family also forgives. Let me say right now that the banning was not all Mathias's fault. Some of it was Mikko. They were like brothers who sometimes just couldn't let it go.North_Ranger said:Hello again, guys and gals! And Merry Christmas, Krazy Kwanzaa, Harmonious Hanukkah and Brain-Splattering Qw'ghh'ia'fhugdhh to you all!
Seriously, I'm still at awe about all this. No one's ever done anything even remotely like this to me, and I can't help but smile a little, knowing you all cared so much about my strange, pantsless, non-sequitur-spouting ass to send me a gift that was so thoughtful. Seriously, with all the things going on and some of the 'friends' whose reaction to my current predicament left a sour taste in my mouth... it's more than a little heart-warming to know that even a socially awkward hermit like myself has so many people rooting for me across this big ol' world of ours. You rock, ladies and gents. Ozzy should write a rock ballad for each and every one of you.
I'm not the only one who's impressed, BTW. My mom, bless her heart, has always been more than a little suspicious of you folks over the Internet. When Baerdog came over for a few days this year, she was more than a little worried, you know, over me letting a "stranger" into my home. She told me that when she understood what the Xbox was for and who it was from, she started crying. Openly. She was so overwhelmed with emotion. She even says she's grown less suspicious of the 'net because of you guys. So thank you for making my mom more susceptible to Nigerian princes wanting to send $30 million out of the country, folks
I have been trying to contact her honestly, but we haven't spoken in a very long time due to her current situation. I've lamented this a few times in the rant threads sadly. I did send her an email and voice mail on this subject though as I know that she and NR were close for a long time.
First, does anyone want to volunteer to write the obituary? I think @stienman knew him better than anyone (I said I think - if this is wrong I apologize).Dear David and all people in Halforums,
Thank you very much messages in forum sharing our sorrow.
We are reading these with my wife, Mikko's mother, really touched us to tears.
We have not been fully understand the sense and power of your community as Mikko's "family". Now we understand that and also the process of his illness with you - as a therapy and spirit.
Mikko's funeral will be held on Saturday 21. December at 12:30 Finnish time.
That day is also winter solstice. The Meaning of day was important to Mikko.
We have three wishes to you:
1) we hope yours obituary of Mikko. You or someone who have been familiar with him and his activity on forum during last years - during over ten years, will write it. We will present it after funeral - remenberance.
We would be happy, if we may get from your forum:
2) putting together - collection of moved messages in Hall of Flame ,
Thread of Mikko's messages how his cancer - going on
Important to us how he processed that with you.
3) after you informed other Halforumites - there is lot of participaiting messages - those we have readed.
May you collect those into document file for us.
How you want us to present Halforum's condolences during Mikko's funeral.
We shall be very glad to present it.
Leila and Timo Metsälä
I'd like to add some personalized messages that have the region of the speaker, and I'd like it to be as varying as possible. Like "Dave from Omaha, Nebraska in the US said..." and this would show everyone there how he touched a lot of lives not just in his area but around the world.The internet is a wonderful thing, and one of its greatest wonders--at least to our little online group--is that it brought Mikko, a man who lived half a world away, into our lives. He part of our digital family from the beginning and, as it grew, he became something more: our heart and our conscience. He was thoughtful. He was patient. He was kind. He was the best of us, and it is a sad, sad joke that he is the first to go.
But he will be remembered; for his good will, for his smile and heart, for his quiet strength. Above all, he will be remembered for the lives he has touched and the good he has wrought. He taught so many of us the concept of a community and to measure our words in kindness and understanding. He lived with laughter, whether at himself or with others, and in so doing helped some of us mend ourselves in difficult times. And, while he was a giant of a man, nobody was ever beneath him--he loved, and was loved by, everyone he spoke to.
Please post them here. I know his parents or siblings are using his account to poke around and read what we are writing about Mikko. Let them see them all, even if I don't put it in the final message.