Completely Uninteresting Relationship Question

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rathkor

I considered posting this anonamously. But I decided it was best to man up and just seek the advice I need.

As boring and cliche as it sounds, there is a girl I like, but I am terrible with girls. I really like this girl. We always have a lot of fun hanging out together. We have a lot in common, she is exceptionally smart, and extremely beautiful, with eyes that shine and a smile that lights up a room. Seeing her can turn a bad day into a great day.

The problem is, I have no idea how to bring my feelings for her, or if I even should. I'm not too worried about compramising our friendship, as she is not the type to let such things in the way of a good friendship. I just simply do not know what I should do. I have no luck with girls at all. My last date was way back when Tila Tequila was popular.

As I said, I know this one is fairly boring and straightforward, and very cliche, but what can I do to maximize my chances of getting a yes from asking her out?
 
have you known her for a long time ? How far are you in the friend zone?

The thing is the longer you wait, the harder it'll be to ask her out.

So invite her to a fancy yet casual place where she can be comfortable and tell her that you want more. Don't be shy and don't be apologetic about how you feel when you tell her. You have to look confident about it.
 
R

rathkor

I first met her back in October of 2009, but I only really started hanging out with her last October. As far as how far into the friend zone, I dont know, although me, her, and a couple other friends once discussed the downside of being in the friend zone, and she was the only one in the group to express her belief that the friend zone doesn't really exist. So take that however you will.
 
Text her "so when are you going to let me tap that?"


I'm semi serious.


Honestly just ask her out and let her know how you feel. Worst thing that can happen is she says no and you're still the same.
 
I first met her back in October of 2009, but I only really started hanging out with her last October. As far as how far into the friend zone, I dont know, although me, her, and a couple other friends once discussed the downside of being in the friend zone, and she was the only one in the group to express her belief that the friend zone doesn't really exist. So take that however you will.
Just go ahead and ask her out. let her know subtly that it is a date.

or buy roofies
 
Be up front, clear, and honest. Some times you gotta gamble man. There are plenty of fish in the sea, but you're in the desert.....alone. If all else fails give her 2.5 mg of Midazolam IM then "date her", she won't remember a thing.
 
C

Chibibar

Do you hang out one on one (just you two?) or you usually hang out with a group of friends? If you hang out one on one, then it shouldn't be too hard. You should ask her out for a nice dinner and see how it goes.
 
Go for it.

Don't be all blubbering and nervous. Avoid being obsequious at all costs. Man up and tell her that you would like to take her out to dinner and a show or an art gallery -- somewhere that allows you to talk to her. Look her in the eyes the entire time you ask her. Don't look at your feet, and fumble with your hands. Be confident, and don't act like it's a big deal to you, but don't act too casual either.

If she says no, big flipping deal. Don't make a big deal out of it, and just say it was worth a shot, and go on being friends.
 
That thing you said about the shining eyes and light up smile? Yeah, don't mention those. Other than that, you have all the advice you need in this thread.
 

Dave

Staff member
Because the really good stuff has already been said...


Learn how to do "The Helicopter" move with your penis. Yell, "Hey! Look what I can do!"

Chicks dig that.
 
Next time you're hanging out with her one-on-one, just ask her out. Movies, dinner, just coffee, doesn't matter. Just make it clear that you're asking her out on date.
 
Here's my advice to you.

Setting up a date with a girl after a very long dry spell can be somewhat intimidating and stressful. Especially when the internet didn't exist back then. Rather than putting yourself into a bad state of mind about the bad things as you tend to do, think positively.

First, have a plan of action when setting up a date with the girl so that the pressure is not on her. It is important not to ask her where she wants to go. Since she's your friend, you should already know about what she likes to a certain degree. Do you have a few places in mind? Plan ahead! You'll get a lot of brownie points if she knows that you have something special already in mind.

Set up a date somewhere casual so that you can discuss life in general and walk around at the same time. Yeah exercise sucks but girls like walking and nature. Fun social activities like bowling... etc can be a good idea but honestly. Whatever she likes. Just no restos or cinemas. There is no pressure to embarrass yourself in front of your date by spilling your food or watching eachother eat awkwardly. Nor is going to the movies on the first date much fun since you're silently sitting beside eachother instead of talking and getting to know eachother.

Tell her that you want to set up a rendez vous date at a specific location on a specific day. Casually tell her that you would enjoy her company and would be excited to see her there. Don't forget to smile when you set up your first date with the girl. She can see how excited you are to get to know her better.

Don't get high expectations, tell her you want to get to know her better, if she wants to spend more time with you and that you enjoy her company, tell her how she makes you feel in a general sense "when you're around, my day tends to more enjoyable" "I enjoy talking to you, you understand me" "are you trying hard to be cute? or does it always come so easily?"

Make sure you don't pressure her to do anything.

And if things don't work out, there's always redtube.
 
R

rathkor

Because the really good stuff has already been said...


Learn how to do "The Helicopter" move with your penis. Yell, "Hey! Look what I can do!"

Chicks dig that.
This. This one right here.
I thought he meant the Dick Slang dance from Tosh.0 that one just seems like it could lead to some serious pain.

but yeah, shes not that kinda girl. there's no rushing to the bedroom here.
 

Dave

Staff member
I actually was talking about that or something like meatspin (WARNING: Do NOT go to meatspin!) but his was pretty cool, too.
 
If you think your friendship is on solid enough ground, just man up and ask her out, along the lines of what Jay is suggesting.

If you don't think your friendship is solid enough to survive, then you need to ask yourself how close a friendship can you have if it won't survive you asking for one date? Then man up, and ask her out.
 
R

rathkor

Those hoping for any sort of follow up or closure: I must disappoint. I'm still dragging my feet on this, like the snivling little coward I can be in these areas. Not that the presidence i've set in the past really gives me much to hope for.

though there is some update: while attempting to ask, but coming nowhere near it, we did watch The Princess Bride (am awesome flick, seriously). dunno if that eans anything, but we both had a great time. a glance was exchanged during one of the romantic scenes, but for the risk of reading too uch into it, i dont think it meant anything at all.

take that as you will.
 
You! Man the fuck up, be the GODDAMNED DRAGON MASTER you claim to be and ask her out. The worst thing that can happen is she says no and stops talking to you, if that's the case...was it really that bad? If she says no, she didn't deserve you.

You were the fastest sperm, you are destined for greatness!

Now look yourself in the mirror, say "I am a man", and start being the awesome motherfucker you know you are.
 
R

rathkor

My family has told me waaaay too much. i was also apparently concieved at a comic book convention, so i was just born to be a geek.
 
C

Chibibar

Those hoping for any sort of follow up or closure: I must disappoint. I'm still dragging my feet on this, like the snivling little coward I can be in these areas. Not that the presidence i've set in the past really gives me much to hope for.

though there is some update: while attempting to ask, but coming nowhere near it, we did watch The Princess Bride (am awesome flick, seriously). dunno if that eans anything, but we both had a great time. a glance was exchanged during one of the romantic scenes, but for the risk of reading too uch into it, i dont think it meant anything at all.

take that as you will.
Aw nuts! you miss a kissing moment!!! how could you?

well. Better man up and go for it.
 
C

Chibibar

Chibi's got point - she might think you don't like her now.
Lets not scare the guy :)
I know my wife and I (before we got married) usually watch a bunch of chick flick (I like them) and we always identify "kissing moments" couple of my friends use them and it works for them. ;)
 
Where was she sitting during the movie? Opposite side of the couch? Right next to you?

If there are other places to sit, but she's deciding to sit specifically next to you, then just go for it next time.

If she doesn't sit next to you, invite her to.


Otherwise just up and ask her out.
 
R

rathkor

i mean, there's complications. shes not really... i mean, she's 19 and has never been on a date, never kissed a guy, and as far as i can tell has never had a single dirty thought in her life. I think if she ever did go out with a guy, it would be a slow progression sort of thing. she's old fashioned, and thats okay with me. i dont see a guy trying to kiss her on what could at BEST be a kinda-sorta-date really flying with her, is what i'm saying. and that is even if that was a kinda-sorta-date, which it could easily not have been, soo...
 
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