The Random Crap Thread

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Hylian

Hylian

I learned that if you forget your badge for work. And security is making a temporary badge for the day and they ask to see your ID. If they make a comment how you lost a lot of weight and you don't look anything like your photo DO NOT make a off hand joke that you could have stolen the ID from someone else. They do not find it funny at all.
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
Morphine said:
A customer just sung to me on the phone :confused:
Weirdest shit but I laughed my ass off afterwards.
It wasn't even a real song he was just singing my name to some random tune.

I love this randomness.
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I'm manning the phones today as well. A dude who worked for a chocolate company offered me all the free chocolate I wanted if I could move his son off the housing waiting list. Man, if only I was in the position to be corrupt..... :drool:
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
Well, work with what you have, I guess. With another dude it was Saints season tickets. I wouldn't want em, but imagine how much I could have sold them for now that they've won a Superbowl.... :confused: DAMN MY POWERLESS POSITION!
 
North_Ranger

North_Ranger

Staff member
When I'm working at telemarketing, I have been told more often than once by old ladies that they wouldn't like the paper so much, but they wouldn't mind a strapping young man.

Kinda creepy. Makes me feel like Wayne Newton or some other artists whose bread and butter is performing so that octogenarians get rushes they haven't felt since the Eisenhower administration.
 
HCGLNS

HCGLNS

It's a beautiful day for the race. Stoogehand is the favourite today, Assault is in there, Dog Bisquit is three to one, Safety Pin has been scratched yeow yeow!, and at twenty to one: Beetlebaum.

Now the horses are approaching the starting gate, and, THERE THEY GOOOOOO!
And it's Stoogehand going to the front, Cabbage is second on the rail, Beautiful Linda is third by a length, and Beetlebaum.

Around the first turn Stoogehand is still in front, Cabbage is second by a head (Cabbage by a head!), Beautiful Linda is third and Beetlebaum.

Into the back stretch, Dog Bisquit is now leading the pack, Lady Avalon is second, very close. Banana is coming up through the bunch (Banana coming up through the bunch!) and Beetlebaum.

At the half Stoogehand still out in the front, Apartment House is second with plenty of room, Assault is passing Battery (Assault and Battery!), Notary's Old Jack is fourth, and in last place by ten lengths I believe it is, yes, it is Beetlebaum.

Around the turn, heading for home, it's Stoogehand and Dog Bisquit and Girdle in the stretch. Flying Sylvester is third and Mother-In-Law nagging in the rear (Oh! Oh! Oh!).

And now they come down to the wire, and it's number one and now number two and it's very close, it'll either be a photo finish or an oil painting, and now Louis speaks with the left, and Louis is in there, slugging, and it's a battle, and now they are tearing hair, there's hair all over the ring, there's hair all over the place, I don't know whose hair it is. It' mine!

AND THERE GOES THE WINNERRRRRRRRR! Beetlebaum.
 
Cajungal

Cajungal

Staff member
So, my apartment complex has adopted this new athletic theme. They all wear ref shirts that say, "Wanna score with me?" which is just weird. Then there's a huge banner hanging from the front office that says, "Wanna score? NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY!" :facepalm: ...... :heh:
 
Baerdog

Baerdog

So one of my friends uses "knitting" as a euphemism for when she masturbates, which puts your post in a whole different light. Heh.
 
Hailey Knight

Hailey Knight

Cajungal said:
So, my apartment complex has adopted this new athletic theme. They all wear ref shirts that say, "Wanna score with me?" which is just weird. Then there's a huge banner hanging from the front office that says, "Wanna score? NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY!" :facepalm: ...... :heh:
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This should be in the epic win thread.
 
David

David

Good luck, Gustoman!

I really want to ask out this girl to see Iron Man 2 with me myself... she's hinting that she really wants to see it, but she's also said no to me last time I tried to ask her out.
 
Gusto

Gusto

Thanks, Der Süden.

I've officially told her how I feel without going into too much detail, and she's taking some time to consider it. But she has agreed to go with me to the GREATEST EVENT OF MY YOUNG LIFE which I might describe further in Epic Win.

For better or worse, for the first time ever, I straight up told a girl I liked her. I feel like a king already.
 
CynicismKills

CynicismKills

Gusto said:
Thanks, Der Süden.

I've officially told her how I feel without going into too much detail, and she's taking some time to consider it. But she has agreed to go with me to the GREATEST EVENT OF MY YOUNG LIFE which I might describe further in Epic Win.

For better or worse, for the first time ever, I straight up told a girl I liked her. I feel like a king already.
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Congrats, dude. It sounds dumb but it's seriously hard as hell to just walk up and tell a girl how you feel. Good on you and I hope things go well.
 
Gusto

Gusto

I think I had it easy actually, since she's a cool enough girl tat I can just tell her that kinda stuff without it being too weird.

Thanks though .:)
 
David

David

Yeah, takes a lot of courage to get out of the "anonymous love note" phase.

Anonymous Love Note would be a kick-ass band name.
 
David

David

So apparently there's going to be a speed-dating thing at my college this evening. I'm debating on showing up or not. I've never heard of speed dates actually going anywhere serious.
 
David

David

Okay, so it's not this evening, it's on Thursday. That's considerably more time to mentally prepare. I just might do it.
 
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