(Context edit: I composed this when the thread still ended at Dave's post)
-To touch on my rework again, I would change the panel to read "Jeremy bought
an iron gun." That saves the "irony" reveal for the later panel and also serves to build apprehension as the reader gets to surf Jeremy's rationalization but has no power to turn him.
-I would then cut the "the gun was made of iron" panel from where it appears earlier and paste it unchanged to between the "bought" and "he sat on the bed an pointed it at himself" panels. The flashback/smash/jump cut that hooks the reader then becomes the "for no good reason, Jeremy cried" panel. Most comics span three panels, with the third panel being a tidy summation of the gag (Dilbert, Fox Trot, Garfield) but in your case, the third panel has him crying and is more open-ended, leaving a question in the reader's mind that can only be answered by reading further.
-I still think the flow demands another panel between the "string about his wrist" panel and the "they came into..." panel. I would suggest that that panel be solid white with no illustration/image at all and only the words "There were others." This serves as a framework to hang the insufficiently defined "they" in the next panel (while leaving it vague enough to not specifically be family/friends/counselors/peers) and the starkness of that three word admission/reminder sans any distracting image should be a powerful punch to the gut, especially for the depressed reader. The lack of imagery should also demonstrate that
this is the point where the narrative changes direction.
I think the above changes would serve to make the whole resonate more with the depressed reader. You are of course under no obligation to use them, but I would encourage you to test those changes with people who
aren't you and see what they have to say.
--Patrick