EA Needs to F*** off and die

I feel like at this point in time, EA's logo should be Snively Whiplash tying Nell to the train tracks whilst twirling his moustache and laughing maniacally.
 
No your right, I'm thinkin' Sony games. I forgot they were made by different companies because both Madden and MLB baseball have incredibly annoying announcers and awful music.
In your defense, I actually really dislike most sport commentating, so that may be a bit "truth in television", so to speak.
 
In your defense, I actually really dislike most sport commentating, so that may be a bit "truth in television", so to speak.
True that, most sports-caster bore the piss out of me. When the game comes on the sports casting is sometimes so bad my dad mutes the TV and puts on the radio. Oh Harry Kallis, 73 was too young for you!
 
That said, I love hearing Martin Tyler commentate soccer matches, because he has a tendency to be a giant stuck-up prick when someone messes up a play.
 
D

Danne

Uggh! I would love nothing more than to rant right now, but, it's late and I will tomorrow.
 
D

Danne

Ok. Ready to rant.

First things first, let me tell you that I am totally bias against EA.

Now that that's settled, here it is.

WHY I THINK EA SHOULD DIE!

First and foremost, their destruction of talent. EA doesn't understand that it requires time to make a game good. So, they force their companies and their workers to work unreasonable hours for long periods of time, setting unfair deadlines all the way. All they want is money, and they are willing to cut corners achieve that goal.

Second. They killed off one of my favorite studios and are killing off another. Yes, i'm talking about Pandemic and BioWare. Pandemic, creators of some of my all time favorite games, was a tragic loss. Creators some great games (Mercenaries 2, LotR Conquest, and the SW Battlefront series), they were stomped out by EA. It's either a conspiracy or an incredible coincidence that the two companies were linked in a partnership. BioWare, creators of the KotOR and Mass Effect series, was the best RPG makers. Then, the whole fiasco about ME3 started, then day 1 DLC, then KotOR releasing without much end game content, then the heads leaving. It is now on a downward slide, thanks to EA.

Third. Their goram customer support. Now, story time!

A few years back, I got a brand new XBLA game! Battlefield 1943. Ah, what a fun game! I greatly enjoyed playing the demo, and had a lot of fun playing with my team of soldiers. So, I used some precious cash to buy the full game. So, I go i to play, and i'm greeted with the EA login screen. "Oh?" Child me thinks. "Well. I guess i'll make an account and start playing!" 15 minutes later, i've created an account and signed in. After signing in, it takes me to the validating screen. It sits there for 2 hours before I cut the xbox off. Over the course of 3 or 4 days, I call Xbox, EA, and a local computer shops support. Xbox friendly greets me and tries their best to help me out. My local store tries their best. EA, on the other hand, greets me in a chat roome with a generic greeting. Then, procedes to list off 7 or 8 generic instructions. I try them, and none work. I try again. And again. And again. Then, I give up. A year later, I try again. The Support guy says to powercycle the router. And, it works! All that time, and 4 conversations to EA, and none worked.

Fourth. Their treatment of customers.

Ea. Oh you rascals! Make someone buy a 10 $ Season pass for a game that's a few years old, then say "Oh! BTW. We're about to shut down support for these games!" I mean, seriously. These games, which people still play, are being shut down. Why? Because you're making too many games and need the server space? Oh! I have a solution! SPEND SOME GORAM TIME ON YOUR GAMES!!! Then, you will be able to support those games and not clog up the servers with the crap! Halo 3 is still being played today! And people would still be playing Halo 2 if microsoft didn't discontinue support. Bear in mind, Halo 2 was released in 04, and it's online was disconnected in 2010!

Fifth. Treatment of loved franchises for more money

Lets take a look at Dead Space 3. "Hmm." Thinks EA. "People seem to really like this game, but we need to boost sales for some reason. Why don't we just say we'll cancel the series if we don't get enough money?" Ya. That kind of stuff.

I could go on, but my fingers hurt

EDIT: http://www.wired.com/gamelife/2012/10/fifa-13-wii/
 
It's either a conspiracy or an incredible coincidence that the two companies were linked in a partnership.
While I'm quite in agreement with most of your post, the industry nerd in me wants to point out that it's neither conspiracy or coincidence that BioWare and Pandemic were linked.

When John Riccitiello left EA in '04, he co-founded Elevation Partners, an equity holding and investing company, which invested around $300M dollars in BioWare and Pandemic in 2005 on the condition that they be owned and directed by Elevation. Among other things, that money funded the first Mass Effect and possibly (but unlikely) Mercenaries 2.

When EA re-hired Riccitiello in '07, this time as CEO, they asked him about ace developers they could bring on board, and he suggested BioWare and Pandemic after working with them for a couple years.

They then unfortunately did what EA does.
 
It seems to me that the real damage was done in the mid 90s-early '00s when the EA Sports franchises really exploded. There was a good decade or so where everyone that wasn't EA Sports at EA was told that they need to be like EA Sports (repeatable, relatively low-cost, low-time-involvement cash cows), and I think that culture has mostly persisted despite the occasional stand-out non-sports title that gets subsequently milked.

That's not even an indictment of EA Sports. They're good at what they do, and if people feel like paying for that stuff every year despite it (especially this time) looking exactly the same that's on those people, but what works for Sports clearly doesn't work especially well outside of Sports if you're not CoD.
 
That's not even an indictment of EA Sports. They're good at what they do, and if people feel like paying for that stuff every year despite it (especially this time) looking exactly the same that's on those people, but what works for Sports clearly doesn't work especially well outside of Sports if you're not CoD.

They can't seem to wrap their heads around this very important point.

(just wait till you see CoD: Mass Effect Edition)
 
I get that they want what Activision has with CoD, but I'd much rather that Medal of Honor and Battlefield focus on what CoD is bad at (open-world, non-TDM multiplayer, their current tech advantage, etc.).

That doesn't mean they can't have a good single-player campaign or anything, but the last title in each series really half-assed the SP to the point of wondering why they bothered, especially considering BF3's multiplayer.
 

GasBandit

Staff member
I have to admit, Bad Company has had some good dialog.

The dumb redneck one, having just spouted off some facts about an airplane, and everybody's staring at him like 'where the hell did that come from?': "What?... I can know stuff!"
 
As good as the game was though, keep in mind the show would be a TV adaptation of a video game. Video games + TV = Usually awful. But if its good I will be happy to eat crow. Seriously TV, don't make me put this in the Adaptation Anarchy thread!
 

GasBandit

Staff member
I've already read the premise. It's going to be awful. They're not even going to be on a battlefield or in combat of any sort. It's supposed to be after they're out of the service, but kind of an undercover A-team type thing going on within US borders.
 
I've already read the premise. It's going to be awful. They're not even going to be on a battlefield or in combat of any sort. It's supposed to be after they're out of the service, but kind of an undercover A-team type thing going on within US borders.
....huh. I really hope someone picks up that phone.
 
Probably the same guy at Happy Madison that thought that stupid movie about a game tester who gets high with his grandmother Betty White was a good idea.

Who am I to judge Happy Madison, it's only made Adam Sandler 133 million dollars in the last 3 years.
 
Probably the same guy at Happy Madison that thought that stupid movie about a game tester who gets high with his grandmother Betty White was a good idea.
UGH, the antagonist in that was probably one of the worst antagonists ever written. Why did he steal the guy's game? IT MADE NO SENSE!
 
I don't mind EA Sports games.
I don't mind their own IPs being unoriginal copies of other people's successes.
I don't even mind their DRM - while Origin is piss-poor crap, it's not really all that much worse than what Ubisoft has to offer, or whatever. Gamespy, G4WL,... No big publisher has decent DRM these days; I'm sort of half-ass boycotting all of them.
I DO mind their acquiring studios and turnign their good IPs into watered-down crappy versions of other people's junk. Whether it's turning KOTOR into a third-rate MMO, or C&C into some sort of fast-paced multiplayer monstrosity, or whatever...Instead of trying to make games better, they try to make them more profitable. And instead of understanding what it's about, they try to copy what worked for others. Football won't be any more popular by copying basketball rules; it'll just turn into a crappy half-way thing. A top-down action game won't become a good 3rd person roguelike just by tacking on some crap and removing some other. Gah!
 
Have to be honest, I owned every NHL game from EA until NHL 13. I didn't bother to buy it. Either due to the fact of me giving a finger back to the greedy bastards of the NHL and to EA's recent assholeness. I've tried Madden and Fifa... both are decent games and would see myself play them over the winter... but won't... cause fuck EA.
 
Their sports games are pretty good in their genre. They're still rip-offs some years. I don't know if I read it on here, I think so, if not you should go look it up - Fifa '12 vs '13 screenshot comparison for the Wii. It's just....Gah.
 
The SSX franchise reboot was really good.

It didn't push the envelope, really, but it was extremely smooth and polished and reminded me of how massively fun the first bunch were. Just being able to zoom down an insane mountain and jump over crevices with the wing suit in HD was awesome.
 
D

Danne

Their sports games are pretty good in their genre. They're still rip-offs some years. I don't know if I read it on here, I think so, if not you should go look it up - Fifa '12 vs '13 screenshot comparison for the Wii. It's just....Gah.
I posted it at the bottom of my rant
 
So, with Gusto sending some Simmy HF'ers straight to Hell lately, I got a hankering to play some Sims. I already own it, but sadly, my new Notebook computer doesn't have a DVD-Rom. And playing it would require some kind of external disc player.

So, I checked Steam. $29.99. Hrm. Not bad, but a bit high for my tastes. But didn't EA have their own store for it, too? Let's see. $49.99?! And each add-on pack is $29.99 a piece? Are you fucking kidding me? If these are digital copies, they better come with a blowjob or at least some porn.
 
So, with Gusto sending some Simmy HF'ers straight to Hell lately, I got a hankering to play some Sims. I already own it, but sadly, my new Notebook computer doesn't have a DVD-Rom. And playing it would require some kind of external disc player.

So, I checked Steam. $29.99. Hrm. Not bad, but a bit high for my tastes. But didn't EA have their own store for it, too? Let's see. $49.99?! And each add-on pack is $29.99 a piece? Are you fucking kidding me? If these are digital copies, they better come with a blowjob or at least some porn.
Where are you looking? It's $29.99 on Origin when I checked. The combo packs are 49.99, but that's the same on Steam.
 
Oops, yeah, you're right. But expansion packs for $30 or especially $40 (for Pets and Generations) a pop is still ridiculous, especially for a digital copy.

I'm also angry they've yet to do a Sims 3 version of University, which was my favourite Sims 2 expansion.
 
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