fade
Staff member
Whine like a baby, now with 500% more drama!
- Thread starter strawman
- Start date
I can handle some claws in my cuddles.
GasBandit
Staff member
So, bagels are empty calories. Yummy, empty calories. Some inconsiderate nothing brought bagels in for the office even though they're off-limits.
... it was me. I didn't think things through. So the rest of the day is about resisting a temptation I created. Classic.
... it was me. I didn't think things through. So the rest of the day is about resisting a temptation I created. Classic.
Given those legs I'd be the biter, not the bitee.
Yes, this is what I come to the Internet for...to watch a cat attempt to assert dominance over what I assume is some lady’s butt.
—Patrick
In other news, today my boss sent out an e-mail saying that, yes, he did say those things I say he did, but my interpretation is all worng and I'm just too negative and unconstructive and I'm just trying to shift blame.
I can't even.
I tried to get an appointment with my doctor to talk things over and see how he looks at things, but I'm quickly approaching the point where I'll just have to quit for my health and sanity. Not sleeping, high heart rate, burning eyes, constantly angry and on edge, completely stressed out, just....yeah, no, I'm done. I want out. My depressive self-harm tendencies are coming back up, my suicidal thoughts and feelings are back in full force, I can barely do the dishes when I get home because i' mcompletely drained and unwilling to do anything but crawl under a blanket.
I can't even.
I tried to get an appointment with my doctor to talk things over and see how he looks at things, but I'm quickly approaching the point where I'll just have to quit for my health and sanity. Not sleeping, high heart rate, burning eyes, constantly angry and on edge, completely stressed out, just....yeah, no, I'm done. I want out. My depressive self-harm tendencies are coming back up, my suicidal thoughts and feelings are back in full force, I can barely do the dishes when I get home because i' mcompletely drained and unwilling to do anything but crawl under a blanket.
Pretty much.
Could you hold on until an appointment and push for a medical leave of absence? I'm not familiar with how it works in Belgium, but AFAIK you can do that in Spain. It would give you some time to get a handle on things, maybe find an alternative job?
Only if the doctor decides to rule it a depression/burnout/other medical issue. He can't write me home for psychological issues.
GasBandit
Staff member
That's a tough spot to be in.
On the one hand no job is worth the mental and physical pain this causes.
On the other hand quitting a job when you are at such a low point emotionally is difficult to bounce back from.
I wish I could give you advice and guidance, I just don't feel I know enough to say definitively one way or the other. Your company may provide counselors (third party - not within the company!) for life situations like this.
Hopefully you can get in to your doctor quickly and at least address the mental health situation, but I doubt that's going to resolve the problem with the company.
I know it's really hard to contemplate right now, but can you spend some energy on job searching, or even just updating your resume?
GasBandit
Staff member
Oh goodie. Word is on the office grapevine, we're about to hire another salesperson who used to sell advertising for our local cable company.
Usually, not being able to hack it at Cable and coming here is a sign there was a problem, because this is not a step UP.
It also doesn't fill me with confidence that the new person is apparently really close friends with my biggest headache salesperson (who also came here from cable advertising).
Usually, not being able to hack it at Cable and coming here is a sign there was a problem, because this is not a step UP.
It also doesn't fill me with confidence that the new person is apparently really close friends with my biggest headache salesperson (who also came here from cable advertising).
I actually managed to update my resume last week. Not finished, but I started. And I checked out openings on line! I didn't see anything worth pursuing, because I feel like I'd be incapable of picking up the trash right about now, but still. I know the only way out is...well, out. But it is hard. And thanks.
I need a real day off. Practicum on 3 days per week, classes on 4 evenings per week, picking my kids up from school only to drop them off at home and I leave again, meal prep Sundays, homework that I can't seem to get caught up on...
Hurry up graduation!
Hurry up graduation!
I've typed this multiple times and every time I sound like such a whiny brat that I delete, but I am so...tired.
I feel like my world exploded and isn't gonna stop any time soon and I"m just so worn out.
Yesterday morning my dad brought me into his office to talk to me about my Grandma (which, my dad and I work in the same department - in case that was weird) and she's basically told the family that in May she's going off dialysis so she can die. She's also upset with me that I haven't come and visited her since she's been in the hospital - she fell and broke her hip.
And I just can't? I barely want to go outside these days, I'm so STRESSED about my divorce and feel entirely alone. I don't want to go visit her because I can't pretend that I'm not pre-occupied with other stuff. I don't mean to ignore her or the rest of my family but I have no energy to deal with them.
Meanwhile....I haven't wanted to talk about this with anybody but, Nate is starting to be mean to me. He and I fight a lot more now, which I can't blame him. I know he's hurting like I am, but he's so mean lately and I've just been bottling it all up because I don't want to talk badly about him to anyone. He's done plenty that he didn't have to do, so I'm grateful to him in so many ways, but just...he says things that really hurt me. I know it's part of why I feel so completely cut off from everyone. Oh, and I should probably say: Utah is really weird and there's a 90 waiting period, in a divorce, before a judge will even look at the paperwork, we're in the final days of the 90 days.
Meanwhile, meanwhile, I'm broken-hearted. After many talks with my girlfriend, we both decided we kinda hate/can't/don't want to do long distance. So, I don't even know what we are anymore. I have feelings for someone with no where for the feelings to go. She barely speaks to me now, which I know why - we've talked and I don't want to explain things here, her reasons are valid, but it still hurts me deeply. She's the one person I trust and wish to talk to and I can't. I'm alone.
I just hurt all over. I sobbed at my desk at work yesterday and I'm doing it again today. Fuck me.
The only good thing that's happened is while talking to my dad yesterday he made sure to tell me him and my Ma still love and accept me as I am, so that was nice. :/
Watch me delete this later. God, it feels so pandering and 'pity me' it makes me sick. Anyway, blah, blah, Kags is stressed
I feel like my world exploded and isn't gonna stop any time soon and I"m just so worn out.
Yesterday morning my dad brought me into his office to talk to me about my Grandma (which, my dad and I work in the same department - in case that was weird) and she's basically told the family that in May she's going off dialysis so she can die. She's also upset with me that I haven't come and visited her since she's been in the hospital - she fell and broke her hip.
And I just can't? I barely want to go outside these days, I'm so STRESSED about my divorce and feel entirely alone. I don't want to go visit her because I can't pretend that I'm not pre-occupied with other stuff. I don't mean to ignore her or the rest of my family but I have no energy to deal with them.
Meanwhile....I haven't wanted to talk about this with anybody but, Nate is starting to be mean to me. He and I fight a lot more now, which I can't blame him. I know he's hurting like I am, but he's so mean lately and I've just been bottling it all up because I don't want to talk badly about him to anyone. He's done plenty that he didn't have to do, so I'm grateful to him in so many ways, but just...he says things that really hurt me. I know it's part of why I feel so completely cut off from everyone. Oh, and I should probably say: Utah is really weird and there's a 90 waiting period, in a divorce, before a judge will even look at the paperwork, we're in the final days of the 90 days.
Meanwhile, meanwhile, I'm broken-hearted. After many talks with my girlfriend, we both decided we kinda hate/can't/don't want to do long distance. So, I don't even know what we are anymore. I have feelings for someone with no where for the feelings to go. She barely speaks to me now, which I know why - we've talked and I don't want to explain things here, her reasons are valid, but it still hurts me deeply. She's the one person I trust and wish to talk to and I can't. I'm alone.
I just hurt all over. I sobbed at my desk at work yesterday and I'm doing it again today. Fuck me.
The only good thing that's happened is while talking to my dad yesterday he made sure to tell me him and my Ma still love and accept me as I am, so that was nice. :/
Watch me delete this later. God, it feels so pandering and 'pity me' it makes me sick. Anyway, blah, blah, Kags is stressed
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It certainly sounds like you have standing.
And if it's gotten to the point where you're posting about it, then I assume there's plenty more that's not being said.
I am sorry you are going through so much all at once, and wish I could do something to help out, but my track record ain't that great and I don't even know where to begin!
--Patrick
*her actual words, not my paraphrase.
I think most of us post here for validation and venting, not pity. FWIW I empathize with your situation, having gone through most of the individual parts (all at once would probably break me).
It's okay.
No worries! Thank you though.I'm sorry you've had to go through any of this.
Likewise, though I should note every situation is different. Do you have anything at home to take your mind off of things? Exercise and videogames work well for me.I'm sorry you've had to go through any of this.
Eh? Sort of.
The weather has been nice the past few days, so I'm picking up running again, which makes me really happy.
I mostly just go hang out with the two people I can stand to be around.
Venting to friends is not pandering. Look at all the whining I do on here! But I do it here so I'm not always depending on Aussie as my sounding board. He wants to fix things. Sometimes that's great, but a lot of times I just want to get things off of my chest. I don't want a blog, so I vent about it all here.
And here is where we all are. Those funny, nerdy, kinda good-hearted people who live in the inter-tubes. We care about you, Kags. We also know that you're human with feelings and problems. No one can be rainbows and sparkly hearts of positivity all the time.
I'm sorry you're going through so much. It's hard and it's ok to need to get it out.
Who has two thumbs (one bleeding) and got to vacuum, replace a monitor with a backup unit, throw away some glassware, wipe down a table, and snuggle a scared kitty all before finishing his first cup of coffee? This guy! Poor, poor scared kitty. The Beastie chased the Floof, which got the dog's attention, who chased the Beastie around the staircase twice, which led the Beastie to run up the couch and straight for me - through my monitor. Ah well. I now have a crappy, washed out looking backup Benq monitor for a few days until my refurbished Dell gets in. Apparently flat screen monitors don't appreciate coffee behind the glass. Who knew?
That's why I have a pc backup in the closet. I know someday it will come in handy. It's a super-old XP machine, but at least it should tide me over if all hell breaks loose.
Come to think of it, we have two backup computers in the house. They're both really, really terrible machines, and neither of them will play games, or videos, or run anything other than a browser really; but they'll get us through if they have to. I could even potentially make one of them a little better, if the motherboard from the one I'm using now could be salvaged - it's the undersized heat sink over the North Bridge on my wife's old gaming rig that killed that motherboard model.
I spent about 3 hours last night shoveling 3-4 days' worth of snow (about 3-4in) off the driveway, porch, and all 4 sidewalks before going to bed.
I woke up to 6in snow by the time to go to work, with total accumulation forecast to be 7-10in.
And it's supposed to snow more overnight.
Good thing I have tomorrow off. Hoorayyyyyyy.
I mean, I want to buy a nice snowblower to replace the 1998 model we currently have, but between the gas and electric bills, I'm already buying a new 2-stage snowblower every month.
--Patrick
I woke up to 6in snow by the time to go to work, with total accumulation forecast to be 7-10in.
And it's supposed to snow more overnight.
Good thing I have tomorrow off. Hoorayyyyyyy.
I mean, I want to buy a nice snowblower to replace the 1998 model we currently have, but between the gas and electric bills, I'm already buying a new 2-stage snowblower every month.
--Patrick
I’ve plowed the driveway (about 250 feet long) five times today, each time clearing 4-6 inches of snow. Due to drifting, packing, and blowing that doesn’t mean we got 20” or more of snowfall, but it sure feels like it.
It’s light fluffy snow too, which makes a huge difference and is much nicer to deal with than some types of snow.
It’s light fluffy snow too, which makes a huge difference and is much nicer to deal with than some types of snow.
