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Wasabi's Whatever Thread (AMA and journal)

May 5, 2018#1

WasabiPoptart

I just realized that my newer AMA was one of the things that was in the 3 month gap and is gone. So ask me about Hawaii, Aussie & the minions, my degree, my job (to an extent), my likes/dislikes, etc. I'm also going to try to keep this thread around as a personal journal. Currently, I post a lot of this stuff on the General forum, but I'd like to keep it more in one place so I can track a few things easier.

May 5, 2018#2

Emrys

Well, now that you've finished your degree, what is next on the agenda for stressing yourself out?

May 5, 2018#3

WasabiPoptart

Emrys said:
Well, now that you've finished your degree, what is next on the agenda for stressing yourself out?

I'm the city & county substance abuse and prevention program coordinator. I still haven't been given my contract (though my boss is paying me in "flex" time). I have a monitoring in 2 weeks and don't know where half of the stuff I need is. The VA paid my housing stipend for the month, but HPU still shows they're owed money for tuition so I have to find out what's happening with that. Then I'm going to have to take a couple of certification classes for the job. On top of it I'll need to take some classes so I can get my CSAC (Certified Substance Abuse Counselor) certificate which I would have tried to do even without this position. Oh and I need to study for my LSW licensing exam.

My son's turning 13 this year. Gibbers Crabst help me.

My parents will find new and interesting ways of driving my stress level up. Currently my mom's not speaking to me because when she asked about flying out to "help" with my graduation, I told her no need.

Hopefully that's about it.

May 5, 2018#4

WasabiPoptart

Oh also, I'm the program coordinator which implies I have a staff. I don't.

May 6, 2018#5

WasabiPoptart

This is a pretty good article about the volcanic eruption, for anyone interested.

May 6, 2018#6

PatrThom

The part I have to keep reminding myself is that you see liquid splashing all around, and you have reference with things like ice bucket challenge videos, and think, "OK so it's hot, but other than that, NBD," right? Well, no. That lava may be liquid, but it still weighs just as much as if it was made of stone...because it is.
1gal of water ~8lb (1l = 1kg of course). But lava? Assuming it weighs just as much as basalt (and why wouldn't it?), that means 1gal of lava is gonna weigh almost 3x as much, or ~23lb (1l lava = ~2.8kg), so even if the leidenfrost effect somehow gives you a few extra seconds' time to pull away, getting "splashed" is going to be like getting hit with a red-hot bag of sand.

--Patrick

May 6, 2018#7

WasabiPoptart

And since it's like 100,000 times the viscosity of water, it's not exactly going to splash on you like water either.

May 6, 2018#8

Gruebeard

Even though you're on a different island, how freaky has this eruption been for you?

May 6, 2018#9

WasabiPoptart

Gruebeard said:
Even though you're on a different island, how freaky has this eruption been for you?

It's like hearing there was a tornado a few counties over. It's close enough for mild concern, but you know you're ok. Aussie lived a lot closer to Mt. Etna (about 17 miles) than we are to Kilauea (120 miles).

May 8, 2018#10

WasabiPoptart

My official start date is Monday.

May 10, 2018#11

WasabiPoptart

Tonight is graduation. I just realized I've been in college for the better part of a decade between my bachelor's and master's degrees. I took a break when I had Lily and when we moved to Hawaii. That's been it. No wonder I feel almost as nervous as I did when I got married.

May 12, 2018#12

WasabiPoptart

So next on the agenda is for Wasabi to shape up. A circle may be a shape, but I don't like it on me. My face is so round. Worse, my daughter thinks I weigh 450 pounds (I forget what she was asking about, but she did compare me to something she thought would be 450 pounds). I'm not even close, but I am obese according to medical charts. It's not that I want to be thin or a certain clothing size. I want to be able to look at myself in the mirror without wanting to cry.

I keep making excuses for my poor eating habits and not exercising. My busy schedule has been the biggest obstacle. Well, I have more time on my hands so that's out the door now. I just don't know where to start. Aussie's a personal trainer. Yes, he can help and I can join the gym he works at for free. I have an exercise program he designed for me a few years ago. I have to change my eating habits though. I can't say "Oh I just need portion control" because that's only part of how I fool myself. "Oh I'll just have a little bit of this," and then I keep going back for little bits.

A bunch of my friends use MLM programs (no, friend, you aren't a "health coach" because you sell shake mix to people and I'm not buying your crap or joining your ~~cult~~ circle). I have a few friends who do the keto diet, which I wouldn't mind except I think it is way too restrictive. So many fruits that you can't eat. No beans. Most grains are out, including oatmeal. I want moderation, not "The Do Not Eat" list.

I think this also means I should have an exam with my doctor. Face the music. I go for my regular ob/gyn stuff. I just had a mammogram. But I haven't sat to talk with my regular doc about improving my overall health. I'm embarrassed to step on the scale, so I avoid going. But I know I need to. I hate blood draws because they are never easy. That increases my avoidance.

I hate being like this.

May 12, 2018#13

WasabiPoptart

WasabiPoptart said:
Tonight is graduation. I just realized I've been in college for the better part of a decade between my bachelor's and master's degrees. I took a break when I had Lily and when we moved to Hawaii. That's been it. No wonder I feel almost as nervous as I did when I got married.

Also final grades came in yesterday. GPA = 3.91

May 12, 2018#14

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
My bust schedule has been the biggest obstacle.

...second funniest typo in a long time (since squidleybits’ vanished in the wipe).

And as far as losing weight goes, we have a healthy discussion going on in the halfitness thread about the safest ways to drop weight, but there is some controversy as to the best method(s).

—Patrick

May 12, 2018#15

WasabiPoptart

I thought I fixed it fast enough. LOL

May 12, 2018#16

DarkAudit

100 pushups, 100 situps, 100 squats, and a 10K run. EVERY DAY.

May 12, 2018#17

jwhouk

DarkAudit said:
100 pushups, 100 situps, 100 squats, and a 10K run. EVERY DAY.

There has never been a more appropriate use of the "I Understand That Reference" reaction icon.

May 12, 2018#18

strawman

jwhouk said:
There has never been a more appropriate use of the "I Understand That Reference" reaction icon.

Well all it takes is one click, man.

May 13, 2018#19

WasabiPoptart

It's Mother's Day. I made my obligatory post on IG with a picture of my mom & kids. The day gives me mixed feelings. I love being a mom. I just hope I'm doing a better job at it than my own mother did with me.

May 13, 2018#20

strawman

You are a wonderful mother.

May 13, 2018#21

PatrThom

Any mother who tries to improve on the job their mother did is a good mother.

--Patrick

May 14, 2018#22

drawn_inward

Are you all planning on staying in HI?

Do you take it for granted living at travel destination?

Do tourists bug you?

How often do you swim in the ocean?

May 14, 2018#23

GasBandit

DarkAudit said:
100 pushups, 100 situps, 100 squats, and a 10K run. EVERY DAY.

What, you want her hair to fall out?!

May 14, 2018#24

PatrThom

GasBandit said:
What, you want her hair to fall out?!

Yes but by then she’ll be truly strong, so she won’t care.

—Patrick

May 19, 2018#25

WasabiPoptart

If you're interested in local coverage of the Kilauea eruption.

May 19, 2018#26

jwhouk

That interactive map is... interesting. Looks like a whole subdivision on the Big Island is essentially gone.

May 19, 2018#27

WasabiPoptart

Homes in the Leilani Estates area are the ones that are most threatened. They've lost about 40 so far.

May 19, 2018#28

WasabiPoptart

One of my participants from last summer's youth employment program was found dead yesterday. She was apparently killed by her boyfriend. She was such a nice person with a good-heart. I can't imagine why anyone would want to hurt her.

May 20, 2018#29

WasabiPoptart

PatrThom said:
The part I have to keep reminding myself is that you see liquid splashing all around, and you have reference with things like ice bucket challenge videos, and think, "OK so it's hot, but other than that, NBD," right? Well, no. That lava may be liquid, but it still weighs just as much as if it was made of stone...because it is.
1gal of water ~8lb (1l = 1kg of course). But lava? Assuming it weighs just as much as basalt (and why wouldn't it?), that means 1gal of lava is gonna weigh almost 3x as much, or ~23lb (1l lava = ~2.8kg), so even if the leidenfrost effect somehow gives you a few extra seconds' time to pull away, getting "splashed" is going to be like getting hit with a red-hot bag of sand.

--Patrick

Did you see this report about a man who had his leg shattered by lava spatter?

drawn_inward said:
Are you all planning on staying in HI?

Do you take it for granted living at travel destination?

Do tourists bug you?

How often do you swim in the ocean?

We're trying our best to stay here. It's way more expensive than most places in the US, but none of us want to leave unless it's absolutely necessary.

I don't think so. We live in military housing, which is generally not where the tourists are. Our jobs have little to nothing to do with tourism directly. We don't hang out in Waikiki or downtown Honolulu which is mostly where tourists go on this island. Most of the activities we do with the kids are either within the military community or more what locals would do because of the expense. Truthfully, though, we'd be pretty thick if we didn't recognize how much money is generated by tourism locally and for the state as a whole.

Overall, tourists don't bother me. Ignorant people bother me. They can be local, military, or tourist. For example: These guys that caught a green sea turtle and posted pictures. Idiots. My old neighbor who told me she loved her trip to Maui because there were more white people there and the Polynesians & Asians were the workers. She also told me that living in Hawaii was like living in a foreign country because so many people don't speak English in public and the signs are even in other languages (Japanese usually for tourists). GTFO. Locals who trash up the beaches then bitch about the tourists not respecting the 'āina - they make me twitch, too.

We had been going to the beach least once a week. 99% of the time when we go to the beach I get in the ocean (if I'm tired or hav a headache I don't). We haven't gone in the last few months because of weather, illness, too much coursework, etc. Today the kids and I are likely going and I am going to pretend I'm a mermaid for a while.

May 20, 2018#30

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
Did you see this report about a man who had his leg shattered by lava spatter?

I did not. Ow.
I mean, it’s pretty much exactly what I described, and yay I have empirical evidence to support my postulate, but still...ow.

—Patrick

May 20, 2018#31

WasabiPoptart

PatrThom said:
I did not. Ow.
I mean, it’s pretty much exactly what I described, and yay I have empirical evidence to support my postulate, but still...ow.

—Patrick

I couldn't believe it when I saw the headlines. We just had this conversation and now there's the proof. I want to know how badly he was burned and if his leg could be saved.

May 23, 2018#32

WasabiPoptart

My therapist is leaving. I have my exit session with her in 2 weeks.

May 29, 2018#33

WasabiPoptart

Saw Solo today. Loved it. It made me want to talk to Tim. We could compare notes over what we liked and didn't like and what old canon they brought back and laugh over some of the funny stuff and talk about Emilia Clarke's wardrobe...but, of course, I can't since he died 2 years ago.

I've been depressed since we got home. I think I'll just go to bed early.

Jun 5, 2018#34

WasabiPoptart

Music

Jun 7, 2018#35

WasabiPoptart

Yesterday we celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary. It's so weird to think that we've been married this long and together even longer. Today, I told one of my coworkers that when we got married I figured out how much time we had physically spent in each other's presence. It came out to about a month even though we had been a couple for close to a year and a half. I have to wonder if all of the distance, with him living overseas and deploying a couple of times, at the beginning of our relationship & marriage is why it feels like we haven't been together all that long.

Jun 9, 2018#36

WasabiPoptart

It's been a stressful couple of days. Nothing major happened, but stressful nonetheless. I've had a headache since yesterday. It was bad enough that I went to bed last night at 8:30. I think it's the vog because the skin around my eyes has gotten red again, too.

Three day weekend. I love you.

Jun 10, 2018#37

WasabiPoptart

Went to north shore with the kids and spent the afternoon at Sunset Beach. Laughing, playing, joking around, singing silly song lyrics...it was just what I needed. Something about the beach always sets me right.

Jun 11, 2018#38

jwhouk

WasabiPoptart said:
Went to north shore with the kids and spent the afternoon at Sunset Beach. Laughing, playing, joking around, singing silly song lyrics...it was just what I needed. Something about the beach always sets me right.

It would appear, then, that you are in the right place.

Jun 11, 2018#39

WasabiPoptart

jwhouk said:
It would appear, then, that you are in the right place.

I have to agree.

Even when we were considering moving to other states I kept pushing for VA, WA, CA, western MD... he gets the Navy stuff and I get the ocean/beach stuff.

Jun 16, 2018#40

WasabiPoptart

A person at my job, in a manager's position for another set of programs, asked me if I would get high with them and another coworker provided there was a place to crash afterward.

Wut?

I'm in charge of substance abuse prevention services. Why would you ask me this? Why would you ask me this regardless, but considering my job - WTF are you thinking?

Jun 16, 2018#41

jwhouk

That brofist was "I'd be thinking and saying the exact same thing."

Jun 16, 2018#42

Cheesy1

WasabiPoptart said:
A person at my job, in a manager's position for another set of programs, asked me if I would get high with them and another coworker provided there was a place to crash afterward.

Wut?

I'm in charge of substance abuse prevention services. Why would you ask me this? Why would you ask me this regardless, but considering my job - WTF are you thinking?

Maybe they think you're an expert on getting high considering your job?

Jun 16, 2018#43

PatrThom

Perhaps they thought you'd be cool with it.

--Patrick

Jun 16, 2018#44

WasabiPoptart

PatrThom said:
Perhaps they thought you'd be cool with it.

--Patrick

I mean, that part is obvious. I'm still surprised over it though.

Jun 17, 2018#45

Gared

That's just flabbergasting.

Jun 21, 2018#46

WasabiPoptart

So one of my aunts died today. Not a blood relative, one that married into the family. Before you give me hugs and break out the sympathies, I was not her biggest fan. She was a horrible human being with a black soul. I could go into details. but there is no need IMO.

The reason I'm writing this is because I feel weird. She's my aunt and I should be sad. I feel sympathy for my cousins who have lost their mother and my uncle for losing his wife, but I'm apathetic about it really. That bothers me.

Jun 21, 2018#47

jwhouk

WasabiPoptart said:
So one of my aunts died today. Not a blood relative, one that married into the family. Before you give me hugs and break out the sympathies, I was not her biggest fan. She was a horrible human being with a black soul. I could go into details. but there is no need IMO.

The reason I'm writing this is because I feel weird. She's my aunt and I should be sad. I feel sympathy for my cousins who have lost their mother and my uncle for losing his wife, but I'm apathetic about it really. That bothers me.

Been in that exact situation, but with someone even (relatively) closer. My stepmother and me never got along very well, and when she finally died from cancer, I didn't really feel sad she had died. I felt sad for my father, of course, but I was actually angry - and still am, to a certain extent - that she passed away on my wedding anniversary.

Jun 22, 2018#48

WasabiPoptart

jwhouk said:
... she passed away on my wedding anniversary.

Ugh. That would be so irritating, like it's her last jab at you.

Jun 22, 2018#49

Chad Sexington

WasabiPoptart said:
A person at my job, in a manager's position for another set of programs, asked me if I would get high with them and another coworker provided there was a place to crash afterward.

Wut?

I'm in charge of substance abuse prevention services. Why would you ask me this? Why would you ask me this regardless, but considering my job - WTF are you thinking?

Huh.

Jun 22, 2018#50

Chad Sexington

WasabiPoptart said:
So one of my aunts died today. Not a blood relative, one that married into the family. Before you give me hugs and break out the sympathies, I was not her biggest fan. She was a horrible human being with a black soul. I could go into details. but there is no need IMO.

The reason I'm writing this is because I feel weird. She's my aunt and I should be sad. I feel sympathy for my cousins who have lost their mother and my uncle for losing his wife, but I'm apathetic about it really. That bothers me.

I don't want to add to your situation, but I think it's good that it bothers you. Apathy can be really dangerous, so I'm relieved it concerns you - hopefully you find a way to redirect it to something healthy.

Jul 4, 2018#51

WasabiPoptart

Well, mom, you did it again. You bought me another new shirt that is not my style and at least one size too large. Yes I'm fat, but I do not wear a 2x and I don't dress like my grandmother. Annoying as usual although I say thanks and put it in the donation pile.
But then you, once again, try to undermine my authority as a parent. Just because Ozzy Osbourne took his grandchildren on a 2 hour submarine ride in Waikiki does not mean you need to do it with my kids if/when you come visit again. $125 per person is ridiculous. I tell her no and her reply is "Well I'll just ask the kids" in this tone like Oh yeah I'll show you. I am their mother. I said no. I don't care that you think they'll like it. $500 spent on that ($125 x 4 people) could be used for so many other things for the kids. And who gives you the right to decide what my children do or don't do?
As for when you can visit next...I don't want you to honestly. You and Dad can stay in NJ. I don't need the arguments, the guilt, or the stress of constantly defending boundaries.

Jul 7, 2018#52

WasabiPoptart

Aaand she does it again. I finally get Noah to tell me what he wants for his birthday. I send her an email from Amazon with the link to one of the toys he wants. Call her yesterday to confirm that she got it.

"They're already ordered!"
They? It was only one thing.
"It was a whole page. I got them all."
I only sent the link to--
"They're already ordered! I got everything on the page that you sent!"
---
Umm...ok. Thanks.

When I got home from work, I checked what I sent to her since a copy goes in my inbox. She didn't read. This extra stuff she ordered was from the "More Items to Consider" area. None of which are things Noah wanted or asked for.

I sound so damn ungrateful. I swear I am not. It's just irritating that I can point something specific out to her and it still gets screwed up.

Jul 7, 2018#53

jwhouk

...I cringe to ask what else was on the "More Items" section...

Jul 7, 2018#54

Gared

WasabiPoptart said:
Aaand she does it again. I finally get Noah to tell me what he wants for his birthday. I send her an email from Amazon with the link to one of the toys he wants. Call her yesterday to confirm that she got it.

"They're already ordered!"
They? It was only one thing.
"It was a whole page. I got them all."
I only sent the link to--
"They're already ordered! I got everything on the page that you sent!"
---
Umm...ok. Thanks.

When I got home from work, I checked what I sent to her since a copy goes in my inbox. She didn't read. This extra stuff she ordered was from the "More Items to Consider" area. None of which are things Noah wanted or asked for.

I sound so damn ungrateful. I swear I am not. It's just irritating that I can point something specific out to her and it still gets screwed up.

Coming from someone whose mother-in-law pulls the same crap constantly, I feel ya sister. We can give her a direct link and she'll still buy a cheap knock-off competitor's brand for slightly less than 5% off. Or, will latch on to only one word of a conversation and be certain that's what she was supposed to buy. Why does she remember the words "ice cream maker" so vividly? Oh right, she's supposed to buy us one for my birthday, right? That's what it was. It certainly wasn't "They already have three ice cream makers so don't buy them another ice cream maker."

Jul 28, 2018#55

WasabiPoptart

This month has been a whirlwind. Dead car. New car. Week long training for work that I helped facilitate. Leading my first quarterly meeting. Dad's truck damaged and me being told half-assed information that made me think he & my uncle were in an accident. Children's annual physicals. A cousin diagnosed with terminal cancer. Planning for a convention in Boston next month. Lily's birthday. Planning a baby shower for a friend. Rescuing kittens and their momma. Planning a revamp of my program's logo and social media accounts. Beach bash for all dojos in the kids' karate school. Water balloon fights. A housewarming horror movie marathon at a friend's place that left my stomach sore from laughing at another friend who is easily scared. A coworker's medical issue that had them taken by ambulance.

Ok August. Let's do this.

Jul 28, 2018#56

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
Ok August. Let's do this.

Nope, sorry, you still have 3 more days of July to get through.

--Patrick

Aug 14, 2018#57

WasabiPoptart

In about 2 weeks I'm heading to Boston for a 4-day conference. It's the first time I've left my kids for this long. Sure Aussie is here and he's got the routine down already. But I'm not used to being the one leaving for any amount of time. It's raising my anxiety and I don't like it.

Aug 15, 2018#58

Sparhawk

You've got it, Aussie's got it. It will be good for everyone.

Aug 17, 2018#59

WasabiPoptart

I've been making a list of things to see and do while I'm in Boston. It's helping ease my anxiety a bit because I do love travel. Plus I get home the day before my bday and have a 3-day weekend. So there are things to look forward to.

Sep 1, 2018#60

WasabiPoptart

The conference was good. I really liked sightseeing around Boston. Flights home were all delayed so I ended up not getting to my house until about 4 hours later than planned. That meant I needed a taxi since Aussie is working. I am so glad to be back in Hawaii, in my house, with my little 'ohana.

I missed you butt heads, too. :heart:

Sep 1, 2018#61

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
I missed you butt heads, too.

D’aww... <fart noise>

—Patrick

Sep 9, 2018#62

WasabiPoptart

So since I'm the cool, geeky mom...I play Fortnite Battle Royale. Noah plays on my XBox account under WasabiPoptart. I don't know why when he has his own XBox account. As such, I decided to create an account on my PC using a screen name I came up with many years ago after reading about The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence and also inspired by Anastasia Beaverhausen.

So I'm going by Gladys Panzerhoff. I told Noah and Lily, who both got the joke right away and mooned me. LOL

But then Noah decided to look up the name online. On his school laptop. o sh-- I put the kibosh on that real quick and had to explain that he might find things that are not only inappropriate for his age, but that would also get him in big trouble at school since search history is monitored.

Sep 11, 2018#63

Emrys

Happy belated birthday, my Hawaiian sister. <hugs>

Sep 11, 2018#64

Tinwhistler

WasabiPoptart said:
So since I'm the cool, geeky mom...I play Fortnite Battle Royale. Noah plays on my XBox account under WasabiPoptart. I don't know why when he has his own XBox account. As such, I decided to create an account on my PC using a screen name I came up with many years ago after reading about The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence and also inspired by Anastasia Beaverhausen.

So I'm going by Gladys Panzerhoff. I told Noah and Lily, who both got the joke right away and mooned me. LOL

But then Noah decided to look up the name online. On his school laptop. o sh-- I put the kibosh on that real quick and had to explain that he might find things that are not only inappropriate for his age, but that would also get him in big trouble at school since search history is monitored.

Is it scary that the first google result for "Gladys Panzerhoff " is your reddit account?

Sep 12, 2018#65

WasabiPoptart

Tinwhistler said:
Is it scary that the first google result for "Gladys Panzerhoff " is your reddit account?

I lost the password to that one and didn't register my email address.

Sep 15, 2018#66

WasabiPoptart

As per usual when I see my parents for any period of time, once the initial anger and frustration wears off I find myself sitting in a depressive fog of apathy and hopelessness, tinged with guilt and self-loathing, sprinkled liberally with inability to concentrate. On days when I don't need an alarm clock, I'm sleeping 9-10 hours. I'm not suicidal, but if I could lay in bed for the rest of my life I would.

Sep 15, 2018#67

Cheesy1

WasabiPoptart said:
As per usual when I see my parents for any period of time, once the initial anger and frustration wears off I find myself sitting in a depressive fog of apathy and hopelessness, tinged with guilt and self-loathing, sprinkled liberally with inability to concentrate. On days when I don't need an alarm clock, I'm sleeping 9-10 hours. I'm not suicidal, but if I could lay in bed for the rest of my life I would.

All the feels.

Sep 27, 2018#68

WasabiPoptart

Got a new psych person. Met with her today. She's got me on new meds. She also has ordered blood work. I see her again next month.

Sep 28, 2018#69

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
Got a new psych person. Met with her today. She's got me on new meds. She also has ordered blood work. I see her again next month.

...considering changing last name to Hemingway.

--Patrick

Sep 28, 2018#70

blotsfan

PatrThom said:
considering changing last name to Hemingway.

Given how that ended for him, maybe not the best comparison when talking about psychiatric issues...

Sep 28, 2018#71

PatrThom

blotsfan said:
Given how that ended for him, maybe not the best comparison when talking about psychiatric issues...

Hey, man. Much as I’d like to, I can’t edit History.
I leave that to Fox News.

—Patrick

Sep 29, 2018#72

WasabiPoptart

So I've been on this new thing for about 2 days. I was told since I'm going from SSRI to SSRI that I don't have to taper or cross-taper. It's a direct switch. So I don't know if I'll feel the effects in about 2 weeks like when I first started my old meds or sooner since the new one is just a different SSRI. I'm hopeful this will work.

Oct 6, 2018#73

WasabiPoptart

Feeling a difference maybe? I've been less tired which has been a great concern for me. Over the past few months I've been sleeping sometimes up to 10 hours if I don't use an alarm clock. Like dead asleep as soon as I get in bed and straight through for 10 hours. Granted, I have had times when I can understand being exhausted like when I just got back from Boston. But not all the time.
I've also noticed I'm starting to feel more interest in doing stuff again. I'm thinking about exercise and how I can fit it into my schedule without having to get up at 5am (less tired does not mean I'm more of a morning person). It's been a long time since I felt like being active. Hopefully this isn't temporary.

Oct 16, 2018#74

WasabiPoptart

Today I realized I'm not feeling as fuzzy-headed as I have been in recent months (despite the anime thread). I'm tired from sleeping on the air mattress while my mom visits, but I can still think clearly. This is good.

Oct 19, 2018#75

WasabiPoptart

Beefore my mom came to visit she told me my cousin is effectively missing. She was last heard from in February. She's been living on the streets in Philadelphia for a while due to her heroin addiction. Last time she spoke to her mom she said a guy was going to give a guy her ID and he was going to get her a plane ticket to CA. I almost cried at work today. I had to attend a meeting where the topic of the main presentation was sex trafficking. So many signs she was at risk, even without considering her substance use. It was painful to realize she's most likely a victim of trafficking.

Oct 29, 2018#76

WasabiPoptart

I took a mental health day. I had flex time, so why not. I'm currently sitting in my house without pants and playing video games while drinking a MOAC (4 shots of espresso topped with house coffee). I'm living the dream over here. LOL

Nov 4, 2018#77

WasabiPoptart

I found my ability to cry again. When I was on Zoloft I would often feel like I was going to cry, but it never happened. I'd just have the lump in my throat feeling and that's it. On the occasions where I did cry I was so completely overwhelmed that it was like the cork blew off. It was unsettling because I am more emotional than that and I have never found it to be a problem.

This week I had a very minor, but personally hurtful, thing upset me at work. I've actually shed some tears over it. I feel like telling people, "Holy shit I'm human!"

On that note...I'm also starting to see that people at work don't realize that things do bother me. I keep it to myself in the name of professionalism, but I need to work on finding the balance so I don't come off as an automaton or suddenly over-sensitive.

Nov 5, 2018#78

WasabiPoptart

WasabiPoptart said:
Beefore my mom came to visit she told me my cousin is effectively missing. She was last heard from in February. She's been living on the streets in Philadelphia for a while due to her heroin addiction. Last time she spoke to her mom she said a guy was going to give a guy her ID and he was going to get her a plane ticket to CA. I almost cried at work today. I had to attend a meeting where the topic of the main presentation was sex trafficking. So many signs she was at risk, even without considering her substance use. It was painful to realize she's most likely a victim of trafficking.

They found her alive and still in Philadelphia.

Nov 8, 2018#79

WasabiPoptart

Why do people look at me weird when I say I like doing research? I'm good at searching for information in journals and other publications. I like reading and learning more about subjects. I kinda like "falling down the rabbit hole", too, unless it's wasting time. Be happy I like it because that means you don't have to do it!

Nov 17, 2018#80

WasabiPoptart

I had a migraine that completely knocked me on my ass.

----

I am so much better today. My head was hurting so bad that I woke up before my alarm clock, unable to sleep from the pain. I also had some awful post-nasal drip. Got myself water to drink, had to use the bathroom, and then ended up dry heaving into the trashcan while I was on the toilet. I called out from work. I quarantined myself in our bedroom so if I was coming down with something I wouldn't be around the kids. I slept from 6am - 9am. Got some more water and Tylenol. Checked my temperature just in case (no fever). Went back to sleep until about 12:30pm. Ate a bagel, talked with Aussie, and went back to sleep from about 3pm - 7pm. Ate some dinner, sat up with Aussie and the kids, then went back to sleep from midnight - 8am.

Since I never had any other episode of nausea or vomiting and had no other gastrointestinal issues all day, I think it's safe to blame it on the combination of the headache and postnasal drip rather than a virus. I can't believe how much I slept. I also can't believe how much energy I have today.

Nov 25, 2018#81

WasabiPoptart

Anyone need a little Mele Kalikimaka in their mail? PM me your address if you would like a holiday card from an island in the Pacific!

Dec 16, 2018#82

WasabiPoptart

One of my work friends is moving back to the mainland. Tonight was a going away party for her. I didn't go and I feel like shit for it. I don't like enough people in my office to want to voluntarily spend time with them on my days off. I am going to a lunch tomorrow with her and two mutual friends. I can't help but think this kind of thing does me no favors as far as my relationships with people in the office is concerned. I'm a not-so-social social worker.

Dec 16, 2018#83

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
I'm a not-so-social social worker.

I like many of the people at work well enough, but because I have such a long commute, I don’t come to the welcome/farewell parties, I don’t “go out” after work, and I rarely come to the bowling/hide-n-seek/tug-o-war “forced fun” events. Thing is, there are people I actually DO like well enough that I want to show/participate, but the commute just makes it a non-starter.

So I guess I can say I know where you’re coming from. Solidarity, and all that. And I can agree with you that yes, it does suck.

—Patrick

Dec 16, 2018#84

Tinwhistler

WasabiPoptart said:
One of my work friends is moving back to the mainland. Tonight was a going away party for her. I didn't go and I feel like shit for it. I don't like enough people in my office to want to voluntarily spend time with them on my days off. I am going to a lunch tomorrow with her and two mutual friends. I can't help but think this kind of thing does me no favors as far as my relationships with people in the office is concerned. I'm a not-so-social social worker.

My company has a company picnic every year, on a Saturday.
I worked here 7 years before I finally went to one.

Dec 23, 2018#85

WasabiPoptart

Something fun I made on Google's Santa's Workshop. I didn't have much choice in hair/skin colors because the elves are stamps.

Jan 19, 2019#86

WasabiPoptart

I woke up in a good mood. That never happens. I'm not a morning person. At All. What's different? I don't know.

Jan 27, 2019#87

WasabiPoptart

I think I have the flu. Not full blown, kill-me-now flu. A milder version because I'm vaccinated. Started Friday night with chills and achy joints. I've slept for 14 of the last 24 hours. My sinuses are irritated and I have a headache. I hope I don't pass this on to Aussie or Lily because they're going on a trip Wednesday. Trying to stay out of everyone's faces and keep surfaces clean.

But it's made me have angry dreams.

For some reason I needed to know the name of the standardized test that Lily's school uses. I couldn't find the principle's number in my phone (we're also friends outside of school). I couldn't get information from the internet. When I got her number, from my parents who were hiding it in a binder (??), the person who answered the phone at the school office told me she wasn't in and then made fun of my question.
Next dream I was playing Harry Potter with Lily. She had a broomstick kind of thing and part of it broke off. I asked her to go find me the wood glue in the cabinet. She brought back some kind of cleaning fluid. Then she brought me something like Lepage's mucilage glue (which I used to use at a great-aunts house for paper crafts). So I head into my parents' kitchen to get the wood glue from the cabinet. My dad is blocking my way because of course he is. I can see the glue on the second shelf, but it is much higher up than it would normally be. I get a chair and climb onto the countertop so I can reach the glue. Suddenly, it isn't there! Then I remember how angry I am at the principle and the person in the school office and start yelling about it all! I made myself wake up after that because I was pissed off for no real reason.

I'm also filling out paperwork for Noah to get into high school. He wants to be in a particular program that specializes in communication and technology. One public high school close to us offers it, but he needs a geographical exception to attend since it's out of our complex/district. I want to encourage his interests. I think he's very creative and the mini-films he's made are good for a 13-year-old using a phone and learning editing on his own. He's got a YouTube channel with a handful of followers, too.
But he's so damn smart. He's ranked #1 in his class. He's a walking encyclopedia when it comes to dinosaurs. He's curious about how things work. Why doesn't he want to do something in STEM? If he decides later that's what he wants to pursue, he won't have the college prep background. If I talk to him about it, he'll change his mind because he's a people-pleaser and not because it's what he truly wants. I don't want to be one of *those* parents who insist my children have to go into certain fields. I'm over-thinking and I know it. And this is all part of the "letting them go" process. It's hard.

Jan 29, 2019#88

WasabiPoptart

I've had a fever off and on since Saturday with it hitting 101 yesterday. Went to the doctor today. Doc said it sounds like flu, but maybe a cold. Definitely viral. Aussie had tried to get me to go to the ER on Monday since I couldn't get an appointment with my doctor until today. I didn't feel sick enough to go to the ER. Had I gone, though, they would have tested me for flu. Doc today said too late since it's past the 48 hours window. Back to work tomorrow.

Mar 22, 2019#89

WasabiPoptart

I'm going to a conference again. This year it's mid-July in Grapevine, TX. Anything specific I should do while I'm there?

Mar 22, 2019#90

Sparhawk

Mid July in Texas? Be prepared for heat, 100+ heat. Not a long drive to downtown Dallas to see Dealey Plaza in one direction, Ft. Worth Zoo and Stockyards to see in the other direction. Grapevine Mills area is shopping, "Downtown" Grapevine has lots of antiques and a train to ride.

Mar 22, 2019#91

GasBandit

I'll echo what Sparhawk said. Light, loose cotton clothes, sunscreen, big hat. I haven't done much of the touristy things around in that area other than Dealy Plaza myself, as I usually only stop in the DFW metroplex to visit someone specifically or to attend a con myself (SGC 2010 was the bomb yo).

Mar 22, 2019#92

WasabiPoptart

Yeah I kinda figured about the heat and clothing. Is the DFW area usually humid? I've got to prepare for looking like Medusa if it is. LOL

Mar 22, 2019#93

GasBandit

WasabiPoptart said:
Yeah I kinda figured about the heat and clothing. Is the DFW area usually humid? I've got to prepare for looking like Medusa if it is. LOL

Extremely.

Mar 22, 2019#94

WasabiPoptart

Oh good. My hair will take on a life of its own. Hats will be a mercy.

Mar 22, 2019#95

drifter

Granted I don't live in Texas, but I have to imagine technical fabrics are preferable to cotton.

Mar 22, 2019#96

Tinwhistler

GasBandit said:
Extremely.

but not quite as humid as Houston.

Mar 22, 2019#97

Dei

My husband wore jeans for a week in the middle of Texas summer and lived, I'm not impressed.

Mar 22, 2019#98

GasBandit

Dei said:
My husband wore jeans for a week in the middle of Texas summer and lived, I'm not impressed.

When you came down, we were having one of the mildest summers I ever remember having. That is definitely not the norm. Was a nice change, though.

Mar 22, 2019#99

Dei

GasBandit said:
When you came down, we were having one of the mildest summers I ever remember having. That is definitely not the norm. Was a nice change, though.

It was 110, so no. Though tbh, the only difference between here and there was humidity, and my husband is crazy and refuses to wear shorts ever.

Mar 23, 2019#100

jwhouk

110. That's a pretty mild day in July here.

Mar 23, 2019#101

WasabiPoptart

Tinwhistler said:
but not quite as humid as Houston.

Mar 23, 2019#102

PatrThom

--Patrick

Mar 23, 2019#103

DarkAudit

PatrThom said:
--Patrick

Wasabi and Grace get hugs, not you.

Mar 23, 2019#104

Sparhawk

jwhouk said:
110. That's a pretty mild day in July here.

But you guys have virtually no humidity until monsoon season.

Mar 23, 2019#105

jwhouk

July is monsoon season.

Mar 23, 2019#106

Dei

Even when it's "humid" in Arizona, it's not really humid.

Mar 23, 2019#107

WasabiPoptart

I'm used to about 60-70% humidity on a regular basis. Anything higher than that and ... well, I posted realistic simulations of my hair though it is shorter.

Post automatically merged: Mar 23, 2019

PatrThom said:
--Patrick

That's not even close to curly. LOL

Mar 23, 2019#108

GasBandit

90-100% humidity is typical of most non-panhandle Texas in the summer, though DFW often gets some relief for being 600 miles from the coast. I'll cross my fingers for ya.

Mar 23, 2019#109

WasabiPoptart

T__T

Mar 23, 2019#110

PatrThom

WasabiPoptart said:
That's not even close to curly. LOL

Think just how humid it would have to be to do that. Like underwater, but in midair.

—Patrick

Mar 23, 2019#111

jwhouk

Dei said:
Even when it's "humid" in Arizona, it's not really humid.

Well, yeah. Even downpours mean a relative humidity of 80% or so.

Mar 29, 2019#112

HCGLNS

Are wasabi flavoured pop tarts a real product?

Mar 29, 2019#113

WasabiPoptart

No, but they should be.

Mar 29, 2019#114

Cheesy1

How about wasabi cream puffs?

Mar 30, 2019#115

WasabiPoptart

Mar 30, 2019#116

DarkAudit

WasabiPoptart said:
View attachment 29549

And the sequel...

May 18, 2019#117

WasabiPoptart

So...hi. I've been busy. And today I told people at my job about my experience with depression. I had too many people come up to me afterward, give me a hug, and say "You're so brave for sharing this with us." No, I'm not brave. If I had diabetes and told people, they wouldn't think I was brave. It's patronizing bullshit. I didn't share my experience because I need the attention or want a participation trophy. I shared because someone in our meeting said something to the effect of we all have some degree of depression, we've all experienced clinical depression at some point. Uh...no. I'm just hoping people don't start treating me like I need to be swaddled in cotton (and no I don't mean a straight jacket).

May 24, 2019#118

WasabiPoptart

My parents are here. I did not take vacation time to be with them. They will be left to their own devices on Sunday while we attend a graduation party for a friend's son (there was already a comment about that, but I summarily ignored it). I am also planning to go out with Aussie at least once while they're here and spend time with friends the day after they leave.

May 24, 2019#119

jwhouk

Good for you. Your life doesn't stop just because they're there.

May 26, 2019#120

WasabiPoptart

That's been a hard lesson to learn since it is the opposite of how I was raised. Family visits from out of state and the world stops turning until they leave.

Jun 1, 2019#121

WasabiPoptart

I SURVIVED their visit! There were no arguments. There were no power struggles. Aussie and I got to go out 3 times. There was no gaslighting or guilt-trips. I'm not wallowing in a pit of depression now that they've gone home.

What alternate universe am I in?!? :Leyla:

Jun 19, 2019#122

WasabiPoptart

Tickets for that TX conference have finally been purchased. I can't wait to have some good Mexican food!

Jun 19, 2019#123

jwhouk

But if you want that, you're going to have to stop in Phoenix first...

Jun 19, 2019#124

Tinwhistler

WasabiPoptart said:
Tickets for that TX conference have finally been purchased. I can't wait to have some good Mexican food!

In Grapevine, there are a couple of TexMex chains that are pretty good (or at least they were 10 years ago): Uncle Julios and El Fenix.

For non chain TexMx, I suggest Esparza's and for more "mex" and less "tex" Los Amigos.

For non food things to do, Grapevine has: Sea Life Aquarium, Grapevine Mills mall with Legoland Discovery Center, Great Wolf Lodge water park, and a glockenspiel clock tower in historic downtown.

Jun 19, 2019#125

WasabiPoptart

jwhouk said:
But if you want that, you're going to have to stop in Phoenix first...

I almost had a layover in Phoenix! Going to be LAX instead, both ways.

Post automatically merged: Jun 19, 2019

Tinwhistler said:
In Grapevine, there are a couple of TexMex chains that are pretty good (or at least they were 10 years ago): Uncle Julios and El Fenix.

For non chain TexMx, I suggest Esparza's and for more "mex" and less "tex" Los Amigos.

I was looking at Esparza's menu last night!

Jun 23, 2019#126

WasabiPoptart

I'm participating in the Honolulu AIDS Walk next week. My goal is to raise $100. I already donated $25. If you'd like to contribute here is the link https://secure.qgiv.com/event/account/801999/

Mahalo for your kokua!

Jul 6, 2019#127

WasabiPoptart

AIDS Walk was good. I got to hang out with some of the people I went to grad school with and some that I know through work. Made some contacts for work, too. The organization made 87% of their goal which is fantastic!

In other news, I think I sprained/resprained my right ankle. I hurt it over Memorial Day while on a walk, then fell in a shallow hole in our lawn while chasing the kids on 4th of July, too. This does not make me happy considering next week at this time I'll be getting ready to fly to Dallas for that conference. I just ordered a new pair of compression socks for the flight and have it wrapped currently. :/

Jul 13, 2019#128

WasabiPoptart

I don't wanna go! *whine*

Damn. I guess I have to.

Jul 14, 2019#129

Celt Z

WasabiPoptart said:
I don't wanna go! *whine*

Damn. I guess I have to.

Hang in there, Parker. The Blip will be over before you know it!

Jul 15, 2019#130

WasabiPoptart

My uncle died. I want company and I want to be alone at the same time. I wish I was back in Hawaii.

Jul 21, 2019#131

WasabiPoptart

Jet lag fucking sucks

Dec 21, 2019#132

WasabiPoptart

Dec 21, 2019#133

Dave

Back atcha. From sunny Nebraska. Ugh.

Dec 21, 2019#134

Dei

It's supposed to be 56 on Christmas. I find that horribly depressing.

Dec 23, 2019#135

Bones

Dei said:
It's supposed to be 56 on Christmas. I find that horribly depressing.

its going to be 39 here...in minnesota.....what.

Dec 23, 2019#136

Bubble181

We're going to have something around 50. Better than sleet, I suppose.

Also, merry everything and happy always!

Dec 23, 2019#137

Celt Z

Make sure you think of us as you sing songs around the pineapple* this Christmas!

*I assume you decorate a pineapple instead of a pine tree. That's how I like to picture Hawaiian Christmas.

Dec 23, 2019#138

jwhouk

58F and rain, thanks to that storm that wandered in from the Pacific.

Dec 23, 2019#139

PatrThom

Celt Z said:
I assume you decorate a pineapple instead of a pine tree. That's how I like to picture Hawaiian Christmas.

"In Hawai'i, every tree is an evergreen!"

--Patrick

Mar 22, 2020#140

WasabiPoptart

Hey friends. Hope this note finds you well. Don't come to Hawaii because you'll be quarantined for 14 days by law. Also, my boss has decided I'm essential since I like doing research. Fortunately I only have to go to the office twice a week and work remotely the other 3 days. Stay safe. Wash your hands. Cover your cough. Stay home.

Mar 22, 2020#141

Emrys

How are you and the family doing?

Mar 22, 2020#142

WasabiPoptart

Emrys said:
How are you and the family doing?

Other than going a little stir crazy, we're ok. All parks, beach parks, botanical gardens, and pools are closed. Restaurants are closed other than for take out or delivery. The kids are out of school through April 7, though that will likely get extended. Keeping them busy is a challenge. On the other hand I'm buried with work. That isn't such a bad thing since it's keeping my brain from going off of the deep end.

I'm terrified I'm going to die if I get this thing because of my asthma. I don't need an inhaler or take medication on a daily basis. It only flairs when I get a respiratory infection, so that's when I end up needing an inhaler and sometimes I get a nebulizer treatment from my doctor. I had a mild case of flu over a month ago and still have a cough. So COVID-19 has me thinking a lot about the possibility that I could be hospitalized or die.

I also had to have a conversation with Lily, who is 10, about her fears that Shawn and I will die from the virus. And what will happen if we die from it. That was really uncomfortable. I lied and said we'd all be ok. I can't stand that this is what she has to worry about now instead of lighter things like screwing up at the school spelling bee.

Jun 12, 2020#143

WasabiPoptart

My psychiatrist wants me to try Ketamine for my depression. Everything I've read says it's for severe cases. That isn't me. But it would be nice not to feel like an empty hole for a while.

Jun 14, 2020#144

WasabiPoptart

So...who wants to help me with Mandarin? Because I have dug myself in deep in Chinese drama/music/book fandom (and some K-pop groups with Chinese members). I can understand some things if people are speaking, like lăoshī , gē ge , yé ye , jiě jie , dì di , hóng sè , numbers up to 3 - you know, like I'm almost 1 year old in vocabulary. I'm completely illiterate like a baby, too. I don't need to be fluent, but I'd like to get the gist of things if I'm watching an interview without subtitles.

Any good books or other references you suggest so I'm not as lost?

Jun 14, 2020#145

Dei

WasabiPoptart said:
So...who wants to help me with Mandarin? Because I have dug myself in deep in Chinese drama/music/book fandom (and some K-pop groups with Chinese members). I can understand some things if people are speaking, like lăoshī , gē ge , yé ye , jiě jie , dì di , hóng sè , numbers up to 3 - you know, like I'm almost 1 year old in vocabulary. I'm completely illiterate like a baby, too. I don't need to be fluent, but I'd like to get the gist of things if I'm watching an interview without subtitles.

Any good books or other references you suggest so I'm not as lost?

It's a good question for @Terrik maybe. If he ever has a break from touching people's mouthes.

Jun 14, 2020#146

WasabiPoptart

Dei said:
It's a good question for @Terrik maybe. If he ever has a break from touching people's mouthes.

I was thinking of @Celt Z and @bhamv3 possibly as well..

Jun 14, 2020#147

bhamv3

I'm afraid I can't help much here, since I grew up with the language, so I don't know how to help someone who's acquiring it as a second language.

Jun 15, 2020#148

Celt Z

My Mandarin is god-awful, but to tell the truth, episodes of Nihao Kailan really helped me pick up the basics when I have to go to visit family.

Jun 15, 2020#149

Dei

Celt Z said:
My Mandarin is god-awful, but to tell the truth, episodes of Nihao Kailan really helped me pick up the basics when I have to go to visit family.

Why did you just give me those flashbacks??

Jun 15, 2020#150

Celt Z

Dei said:
Why did you just give me those flashbacks??

Uh oh...

Jun 15, 2020#151

WasabiPoptart

bhamv3 said:
I'm afraid I can't help much here, since I grew up with the language, so I don't know how to help someone who's acquiring it as a second language.

I figured it was worth a shot since you do translation. Thanks!

Jun 15, 2020#152

WasabiPoptart

Celt Z said:
My Mandarin is god-awful, but to tell the truth, episodes of Nihao Kailan really helped me pick up the basics when I have to go to visit family.

How do you think I know yé ye and hóng sè? Though eventually my kids and I started calling her Big-head Kailan. We acted out the Sun Fuzzies attacking her one day "Look Sun Fuzzies! OMG IT BURNS!!" Good times.

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