[Rant] New Conspiracy Theory: Water is Less Wet

I was in the shower when it occurred to me, it takes me a lot longer to bathe and specifically wash my hair than it used to. My hair just cascades water right off of it. It didn't use to do that, it's definitely something new and something so gradual that I almost didn't see it.

I think the government is putting chemicals into the water that make it LESS WET! That way it takes longer for you to do simple chores like bathing/showering, doing laundry, or washing the dishes. The end result is HIGHER WATER BILLS for you with the beneficiaries being the water suppliers be they local municipalities or companies working on their behalf! The common person is screwed by big local government again!

It could possibly even be one of the sinister chemicals we already know about, like they stuff they're using to turn the frogs gay or even FLOURIDE! Think about it, you can't hardly make a toothpaste without flouride nowadays and when you open your mouth and touch your teeth they are BONE DRY! That's funny, where'd all the saliva go? You know, THE WATER!

Now, some of you might be thinking that this is all a put-on. Ol' Gen Spec had a crazy idea and thought it'd be fun to write it all down and let everyone have a bit of a laugh! But no! I'm as serious about this as I was about that aligator that's jealous of my hair! I'm on to you, gator!

Others may say this is just dumb. Oh really? Dumb?

glass-onion-dumb-2.jpg


Check and mate, my friend.
 
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