That is what I'm wondering too. If it is depression, they might need to see a psychiatrist. Depression are tricky stuff. I have several friends who are really depressed and need professional help cause I'm not certified to help.What makes you say it's depression?
I love that video. Even used it on a couple of peopleMy solution to everything is to "harden the fuck up".
Well Shawna, do you understand why she is is so negative? Is it because she hates her job, feel trapped in their shitty life or do they lack in self esteem so the only way they can feel powerful is by hurting others? If you can understand where it’s coming from it’s much easier to deal with. Some people seem to think that the only way they can get what they want is to be manipulative. They think that if they don't whine and complain that they won't be heard and that this is the only way to get what they want.
Personally I'd day whenever the negative tirade starts just smile and don’t say anything. Remain completely detached from it and don’t get involved in it. Leave the room if you can. The negative person is simply seeking to get a reaction from you. That’s what they feed on. Don't let them catch you in their web of negativity because as soon as you do, that’s when they start draining your energy. It's the emotions that these negative people stir up in you that you need to learn to distance yourself from. Try just observing the whole scene. Say to yourself, "what a shame this person is so unhappy. Maybe some of my positive energy will rub off on her. If not, her unhappiness has nothing to do with me."
This isn't always an easy thing to do but definitely a powerful technique. In order to get the full benefit from it, you need to make sure that you're aware of what's going on around you. It's easy to slip into auto-pilot and not realize until later how drained you feel.
Perhaps may be feeling that you have to solve the problems of the energy drainer. You’re not responsible for the person’s life nor their negativity. You don’t have to feel guilty for them being unhappy! Let go of trying to fix or help them. That's not what they want anyway. They want your energy and so you have to be strong and not give in to them.
It's important to be able to let go of the idea that you owe everyone a solution. With some people you just have to let them go. They have to take responsibility for their own lives and they won't if someone is always there to fix everything for them. So, Let Go! It sounds mean but it definitely doesn't help them if they end up taking you down with them. In that case, then neither one of you is benefitting.
You went through a lot of shit recently. You don't need this.
Seems like Jay has given a bunch of good advice - that's what we keep him aroudn for, after all; -)
Anyway; about your friend: have you considered other possibilities? The negative behaviour you're describing doesn't sound all that typical for a depression - it reminds -me- more of someone who's doing drugs, is burning out due to stressrelated problems, or something in that vein. Not accusing anyone of anything, but it's always a possibility. Same goes for unwanted pregnancy, by the way. Can cause pretty much that reaction. Not that it's *common* - much more likely she's just annoying and self-centered and, because you've been through a lot lately and have probably needed some support, she now needs/wants attention. WHich, in that case, you shouldn't give her.