Best Answer Ask a Cleric

Coming from the Happy Holidays thread which has shifted to now include many stories of bad clergy, it occurs to me, that some folks on here may have some questions for clergy types. Possibly/probably of the pissed off nature (and not without reason).

So if you:
a) have stories of the horrendous things done by clergy, and are willing to share, and (probably) be vindicated with another person with that same job title face-palming at them, or
b) have pointed religion-oriented questions (Christian or otherwise, I'm originally trained in Religious Studies which tries to cover everything from a secular point of view), or
c) are just generally nosey about what I do/believe,
ask away.

I realize that this is somewhat risky, since personal beliefs are, well, personal, so if things get to heated I will probably just defer to academic-types and leave my own thoughts out of it.

And mods: if this should be moved to politics/religion sub-board, move away.
 
I might be back later, but I have no burning questions rarin' to go.
Also, I would like to say you are very brave.

--Patrick
 
I might be back later, but I have no burning questions rarin' to go.
Also, I would like to say you are very brave.

--Patrick
I would hope that, on this forum at least, it wouldn't take a lot of bravery to have this sort of conversation. I'm a godless heathen, myself, but that doesn't mean I hate anyone that isn't. I even respect @stienman who is the religious opposite* of me.


*Ok, I guess Mormon wouldn't be the exact opposite... the exact opposite would be someone that believes in every religion, I suppose? And was probably also from bizarro land.

My question to @Dirona is... what kind of cleric are you? And what edition rules?
 
When I cast the Resurrection spell, do I have to use a 10,000 gp diamond or will several smaller diamonds together work?

On a more serious note, what is the belief in any or all faiths concerning pets and the afterlife? I've always been taught that since animals have no souls, when they die, that's it. Frankly, that seems like a really sucky end for a creature who offers love and trust and asks for so little in return. So, truly, do all dogs (animals) go to heaven?
 
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (ie Mormon): Animals have spirits, and like humans will be resurrected and enjoy eternal life. ( see http://eom.byu.edu/index.php/Animals )
Good Guy Pope Francis has also said that dogs can go to heaven. Though, I suppose it could be questioned as to whether he was speaking officially as Pope, or just trying to comfort a child, since it does go against previous Catholic doctrine.
 
Good Guy Pope Francis has also said that dogs can go to heaven. Though, I suppose it could be questioned as to whether he was speaking officially as Pope, or just trying to comfort a child, since it does go against previous Catholic doctrine.
I believe he is really trying to start the slow process of bringing all the dogma into the modern era.
 
I'm noticing a lack of cleric replies in this thread. Just like religion to promise answers and then go silent when you pose the questions. :troll:
 
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I am also noticing a lack of serious questions. Given the title and the current trend: what is your view on D&D? and why do you think many in the church view/viewed it as evil?
 
I am one hundred and ten percent in favor of this thread. Both for it's intended purpose and the natural perversion that Halforums takes it too.

I have nothing at the moment, but I do look forward to using this thread.
 
As her Husband, I am staying the hell OUT of this thread, other than the occasional tag.

Have fun hon!
 
Because I can, I'm answering all questions 'straight.'

My question to @Dirona is... what kind of cleric are you? And what edition rules?
I am in the Ordained steam of the United Church of Canada.
This is one of... like half a dozen or more officially sanctioned minister types in this denomination.


When I cast the Resurrection spell, do I have to use a 10,000 gp diamond or will several smaller diamonds together work?
On a more serious note, what is the belief in any or all faiths concerning pets and the afterlife? I've always been taught that since animals have no souls, when they die, that's it. Frankly, that seems like a really sucky end for a creature who offers love and trust and asks for so little in return. So, truly, do all dogs (animals) go to heaven?
Logically, I would think that several smaller diamonds would work, assuming the total value is equivalent.


Re: Pets. Myself and an Anglican (Episcopalian for you yanks) had a disagreement with the local Pentecostal pastor about this back in October. The two of us were offering a blessing of the animals service as a fund raiser for the local cat rescue place and community event, and the Pentecostal pastor got his nose out of joint about 'animals don't have souls.' Whether they do or not, I personally don't care that much – they are a part of our lives and part of our families, and as such deserve respect and recognition. From a full on theological stand point, I believe that all of creation will be reconciled to God, so YES, all critters go to heaven.

Good Guy Pope Francis has also said that dogs can go to heaven. Though, I suppose it could be questioned as to whether he was speaking officially as Pope, or just trying to comfort a child, since it does go against previous Catholic doctrine.
The amount of bickering I have been seeing among the RC clergy/bureaucracy about Pope Francis is truly staggering. I'm not sure I trust the guy, he seems to say all the right things, so I'm suspicious, and I think he's got a helluva PR machine working for him.



Do you carry a mace, a morningstar, or are you strictly a caster?
Since I'm in the office on my own more days than not, I'm thinking I really should get some mace. It's creepy in here sometimes, especially when it's dark outside. Though if I ever get to do training, I want a quarter staff.


I'm noticing a lack of cleric replies in this thread. Just like religion to promise answers and then go silent when you pose the questions.
I'm in Newfoundland! I posted this thread then went to bed, assuming I'd get to answering before most of y'all got up in the morning.
Yeesh. ;)


I am also noticing a lack of serious questions. Given the title and the current trend: what is your view on D&D? and why do you think many in the church view/viewed it as evil?
My only beef with D&D is the hatchet job it does on a lot of mythology. Seriously, I've gone on multiple rants about this. @Eriol can vouch for this.
I'm all for D&D etc. I'd actually love to play, but Eriol and I have never found a group.
And why did church peeps view it as evil... people are weird. Change and new things scare them, especially when it appeals to younger folks and the 'responsible adult types' don't really get it. Think about all the ranting and raving there is about 'kids these days' and their smart phones texting all the time yadda yadda yadda, I think it's the same thing. That D&D (and Harry Potter) also mentions supernatural things makes it more ripe for religious types to get all hot and bothered.


When clergy make a mistake over the course of their duties, do they call it a "clerical error"?
I haven't before, but I am now!
 
My only beef with D&D is the hatchet job it does on a lot of mythology. Seriously, I've gone on multiple rants about this. @Eriol can vouch for this.
If you REALLY want to hit her berserk button, try defending the names of espers/spirits/eidolons in the Final Fantasy series. In particular, defend Shiva. I dare you.
 
If you REALLY want to hit her berserk button, try defending the names of espers/spirits/eidolons in the Final Fantasy series. In particular, defend Shiva. I dare you.
If I have a nerd rage button, this (being: what I deem misappropriation/cannibalizing/general fuckery of myths and mythology) is probably it.

And because I have to go fold bulletins for Sunday, I'm going to not go into that now. Though I may need to return to this. It's like a scab I have to pick at. Arg!
 

GasBandit

Staff member
Speaking of wrong mythology, it just drives me nuts how even in the english translation of Code Geass, the world-ending superweapon is called the "Fleija" warhead, pronounced "Flay-uh," when it's clear that the word is the standard Japanese mispronunciation of the R into an L, and it should be Freyja, named after the norse goddess of (among other things) death.
 
Why is the concept of Heaven presented as having linear timelines?
I haven't had that many heaven conversations, and TBH, the flow of time hasn't really come up. I have a hunch that it's related to how time is generally perceived as linear in western/Greek thought, where we get a lot of our north american cosmology from - in contrast to 'eastern' cosmologies which are more often cyclical (think: cycle of death/rebirth in those belief systems that have reincarnation.)
At least that's as much as I'm willing to pick out on my tablet right now.
If I think of anything over night I'll get back to you.
 
Do you believe there is one, everyone-together Heaven, or some sort of compartmentalized everyone-gets-what-they-want/believe/etc thing? Or do you not believe Heaven is something comparable to corporeal life in any meaningful way?

That is, a good, nice, God-fearing, doing-everything-right, Christian from the 12th Century, would he end up in the same Heaven as, say, a 21st-century good, God-fearing, love-spreading Canadian cleric upon death? Or do both get a Heaven that's somewhat comparable to what they expeted to end up with/be satisfied with? Or should we view Heaven as some sort of Nirvana-like state of mind, being continually blissfull/happy?

Even more general - how do you think Heaven could conceivably work (yes, I admit, "God's ways are beyond human understanding" is an actual, sensible answer to this question - but it's also a dull one)? In my view of Heaven I might want to be reunited with my grandparents as I knew them - the loving elderly people who took me on trips and told me warm stories - but I imagine they might prefer coming back as their 25-year-old versions. Are both aspects of their persona present in different forms? Are both present in "different" Heavens? Etc etc.

Questions from an agnostic forever searching for meaning in life - in religion, philosophy, anything - wanting to believe but failing, and adrift in life :)
 
These took loger to get to than I would like, sorry guys.

Do you believe there is one, everyone-together Heaven, or some sort of compartmentalized everyone-gets-what-they-want/believe/etc thing? Or do you not believe Heaven is something comparable to corporeal life in any meaningful way?

That is, a good, nice, God-fearing, doing-everything-right, Christian from the 12th Century, would he end up in the same Heaven as, say, a 21st-century good, God-fearing, love-spreading Canadian cleric upon death? Or do both get a Heaven that's somewhat comparable to what they expected to end up with/be satisfied with? Or should we view Heaven as some sort of Nirvana-like state of mind, being continually blissfull/happy?

Even more general - how do you think Heaven could conceivably work (yes, I admit, "God's ways are beyond human understanding" is an actual, sensible answer to this question - but it's also a dull one)? In my view of Heaven I might want to be reunited with my grandparents as I knew them - the loving elderly people who took me on trips and told me warm stories - but I imagine they might prefer coming back as their 25-year-old versions. Are both aspects of their persona present in different forms? Are both present in "different" Heavens? Etc etc.

Questions from an agnostic forever searching for meaning in life - in religion, philosophy, anything - wanting to believe but failing, and adrift in life.
I really like the idea of a corporeal heaven. It's damn comforting. And from a logistical perspective, I think that everyone would see/experience what they would expect/need to experience, though I think it would be physically the same plane/place. Otherwise, you'd spend a few millennia going “WTF is this?” At pretty well everything. But the streets of gold, and cherubim playing instruments, and peeking through clouds to see what's going on elsewhere... nope. Well, maybe that last one, 'cuz that would be cool to be able to do.
So I would hope that you would see your grandparents as you remember them, and they would see you as they remember you, and y'all'd be able to reunite, but that ultimately you'd each see each other for who you truly are (what that looks and feels like, *shrug* hell if I know). And since there's peeps I'd like to meet from a few centuries ago, they better be in a reachable place, 'cuz me and Augustine and Paul need to have a chat.

OTOH, the Nirvana option, where we simply cease to suffer and become one more drop in the ocean of eternity has considerable merits as well. Because the amount of BS I've seen that arises from what I just described is horrendous and often sexist, abelist, and ageist, and well, that ain't a heaven I would want to be part of. And because this option is harder for most folks to wrap their heads around, I have a feeling it may be 'more correct,' if that's a thing in this area.

Short answers to your questions: Both, sure (because that's how we understand our surroundings), yes, yes, and why not.


Aside: There was a joke that went around in the Neo-Pagan circles I travelled in that was something to the effect of: The Christian and the Pagan both end up in the underworld/hell, the Christian sees lakes of burning fire etc., the Pagan sees Elysium.
I have a feeling that that has influenced my perspective more than I care to admit.


And complete aside: "God-fearing" is icky. It leaves out the wonder and curiosity part of 'God is awesome,' and leaves only the fear and trembling part, which rather misses the point IMO. But there's also no good substitute phrase that I know.

And re: "wanting to believe but failing" - modern church mantra: Belong, Behave, Believe. The way our parents and grandparents grew up was: Believe, Behave, Belong.
And 'behave' is no longer 'speak when spoken to, father knows best, etc.', it's 'go make the world/your community a better place, don't be an ass, etc.'
Belief, at least for some denominations is... not optional exactly, but kind of squishy. At least, that's been my experience.

Pre-Trib, Mid-Trib, Post-Trib, or Amillennial?
Personally: Eschatology is not my bag. It's an interesting philosophical discussion at best, but I just don't feel like I have a personal stake it in. Statistically I'll be long dead, and since scripture is fuzzy, and none of the theologians I've read have made compelling arguments, I hate to say it, but I simply don't care. And also truly don't understand those who get all in a lather about it. So, sorry to take a really interesting topic and kill it, but this one's just very 'meh' for me.

And since now I'm curious, I wanna see if my denomination has anything to say about this. To the website!

Denominationally: Huh. The most I could find was from the Articles of Faith, put together back in the 20's. The final article, fittingly, says this (among other things): “We joyfully receive the word of Christ, bidding His people go into all the world and make disciples of all nations, declaring unto them that God was in Christ reconciling the world unto Himself, and that He will have all men to be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth. We confidently believe that by His power and grace all His enemies shall finally be overcome, and the kingdoms of this world be made the Kingdom of our God and of His Christ.” So, apparently I'm not a heretic according to my employing denomination. Good to know!
 
They any good?
The first 4 are practically Fantasy standards, the following 3 are still worth reading but suffer a little from sequelitis, and I didn't know there was an 8th until I went to get that link.
The above is obviously my personal opinion, and is not intended to serve as a substitute for any sort of actual review.

--Patrick
 
The first 4 are practically Fantasy standards, the following 3 are still worth reading but suffer a little from sequelitis, and I didn't know there was an 8th until I went to get that link.
The above is obviously my personal opinion, and is not intended to serve as a substitute for any sort of actual review.

--Patrick
I don't have an occasion to get pressies or buy books for myself any time soon, but I think I'll stick those on the Amazon list for future reference.
 
'Tis the season to get dragged to church - share your annoyances (or any good ideas I can steal) here! Also, refine your religious arguments before the holiday get together.
Your sarcastic local cleric is bored as balls at work and happy to help you get through the happiest time of the year!
 
I want more people to pay attention to more recent birthdays on December 24th (i.e. mine), than ones that happened a long time ago and presumably on a different date altogether (i.e. the Lord and Savior). I've tried lying naked on some straw in the village square, but that just got me chased away by the cops. Any better ideas?
:D
 
I want more people to pay attention to more recent birthdays on December 24th (i.e. mine), than ones that happened a long time ago and presumably on a different date altogether (i.e. the Lord and Savior). I've tried lying naked on some straw in the village square, but that just got me chased away by the cops. Any better ideas?
:D
Have you considered recruiting some angels?
You could probably get some folks to show up late and bring impractical gifts....
 
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