[Contest] Insult or compliment Dave and win a prize!

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There's no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune.




Thou art unfit for any place but hell.
(aw snap)
 
Limiting myself to 5 of each:

-Not saying Dave is old, but he was Galactus' godfather.
-One word from Dave can make a strong man weep and a young man cry...his breath is that bad.
-Dave found a cure for his sagging gut and flappy hooties! He just plugs his nipples into his belly button. Both problems solved!
-Dave is quite the codger. He always gets mad if you forget to cut up his marshmallows.
-Dave drives an electric car because he feels burning gas disrespects his family's remains.

On to the compliments!

-There are many mods, but only one Dave. This is what is meant by Intelligent Design.
-Dave is so patient, he once won a staring contest with a mirror.
-We love Dave so much, we canceled the parade for Inanimate Carbon Rod and held a parade for him, instead.
-Dave is so smart, Alex Trebek tells HIM, "Suck on it!"
-Dave impressed the Universe so much with his benevolence, it chose him to raise Sammi.

--Patrick
 
One night spent with Dave, and women are ready to become nuns.

Dave's brain is so weak that he has to wear crutches under his ears.

Dave is such an old sourpuss that when he sucks a lemon, the lemon makes a face.

A wise man once deduced that there were three things fundamentally wrong with the universe. All of them are Dave.

Dave sucks too much for me to finish this se

Dave appears to be the culmination of generations of major genetic mishaps.

...........................


Wait, there was a contest?
 

Dave

Staff member
Okay, the votes are in and the winners were chosen by my daughter and her boyfriend. In reverse order they are...

Third place, winning Costume Quest... rac3r_x!! Let it be known that their decision was based almost solely on the name "Smeghead". My daughter is a Red Dwarf fan, too!

Second place, nabbing a pristine copy of Psychonauts... Ravenpoe for his ramblings about genetic mutations. Ironic when you figure that she is next in line, but the irony has passed her by.

Our GRAND PRIZE WINNER of the Humble Bundle V is... LittleSin!! Because the teenagers giggled like idiots over the name "douche canoe".



Congrats to the winners, thanks to all you fuckers who thought it was fun to pick on poor old (and I do mean OLD) me! Prizes will be sent by PM in about 5 minutes.
 
Yeah, here I was thinking we'd be judged by beings as old as Lilith and Adam, and we get judged by people not allowed to drink! Tsk!

Congratulations to the winners!
 
...I have a confession.

I thought there was no way in hell I could win this contest sooooo....

I already bought the humble bundle. :hide:
 
Are we doing the compliment contest yet? I don't think I'm allowed to post mine outside of the NSFW board...
I'm actually thinking about HCGLNS idea.

However, it is a bit exclusionary. So maybe I should post a thread and just have people tell me stories.
 
S

SeraRelm

There once was a Dave from Nantucket, with a hooty so flappy he could tuck it. He said, with chagrin, as he flexed his admin, "I'll ban the next Mathias ruckus."
 
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