Really? Let me try.

Smurf.

What the smurf.

Suck my smurf, you smurfing piece of smurf.[DOUBLEPOST=1461720001,1461719966][/DOUBLEPOST]Hey it's still censoring me. :(
 
...I thought Grape-fruite canteloupe water would be a LOT better than what it ended up tasting like, rather than horrible BLAST of fruity intensity-THEN water. I thought it'd be like Cocoa water, where it was a nice accent throughout.
 
My mother has apparently now taken to screenshotting those annoying conservative spam chain mails that old people like to send around and posting them to Facebook with 100% sincerity.

*sigh*
 

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Staff member
I wrote some new code for work today that just worked. I'm not sure what to do with this. I'm fairly certain that this means hell has frozen over or that the apocalypse is about to start.
 
I wrote some new code for work today that just worked. I'm not sure what to do with this. I'm fairly certain that this means hell has frozen over or that the apocalypse is about to start.
From personal experience, the code fails in insidious ways that will only be revealed on the edgiest of edge cases. Did anyone but you QA/review it?
 

fade

Staff member
From personal experience, the code fails in insidious ways that will only be revealed on the edgiest of edge cases. Did anyone but you QA/review it?
They will soon. I'm sure someone will manage to break it. It's amazing what weird-ass ways people find to break software.

"So let me get this straight, you managed to digitize a piece of toast and wedge it into the byte structure of the program?"
 
They will soon. I'm sure someone will manage to break it. It's amazing what weird-ass ways people find to break software.
In the online text game I used to GM, I rewrote the PUT command to handle every single potential parsing situation. PUT SHOE IN SACK, PUT SHOE IN BOX, PUT BOX IN SACK, PUT SHOE IN BOX IN SACK, PUT SHOE IN BOX IN SECOND RED SACK and on and on. I was so proud of what I had done.
Not even an hour after my upgraded version was released to the public, a well-known player sent up a bug report and I went down to investigate.
Him: "So I'm concerned about this."
Me: "What'd you find?"
He then puts his pants into his backpack...while he's still wearing them. He didn't go into his backpack, just the pants. The PUT command just obediently whisked them from his legs directly into his backpack.
Him: "This is really funny and unexpected, I figured you should know about it."
Me: "OH NO THIS IS A DISASTER!"
...see, I realized what this meant was that I had forgotten to test whether the item he was PUTting was actually in one of his hands to start with. Easy enough to fix, right? Basically add one line of code: "IF NOT ((item=RH) OR (item=LH)) THEN RETURN <fail>," right? Well, I also realized that this meant that anyone could've put ANYTHING from the game into their backpack straight off the floor. "You see some mountains in the distance." <PUT> "You put the mountains into your backpack." The potential damage to the game was downright incalculable. The routines had passed QC and been reviewed by multiple peers prior to release, and yet some smart player finds this bug in less than an hour without even having access to the code. Fortunately nobody else had discovered it.

--Patrick
 
How long has this thread had the bacon minotaur Penis tag? Because it sure as hell shocked me when it was the 2nd Google result.
 

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Staff member
We just got a call from the school counselor. My 8 yr old daughter and friends got a talking to because they made a penis out the wax from the outside of a piece of cheese. The counselor would not say penis on the phone. My wife had to ask if she meant a penis, because it wasn't clear. No part of this story is not hilarious to me. A grown woman won't say penis, and a bunch of third grade girls made a penis out of cheese wax. This is comedy gold.
 
Ivory soap works really well after it's been sitting in the back seat of the car on a hot Summer day, too.
The camp counselors in the front seat had 10yr-old me (and the other three kids) hand it over, so fearing for my safety I mushed it before I passed it up.
Decades later, I realized they probably weren't asking for it because they wanted to chide me about it, they probably were secretly thinking, "That is cool I want a look" but of course couldn't say that.
Live and learn.
Also:
99e1a228212ca84bfdb9c3a7a838648c.jpg


--Patrick
 
I only have an extended length e350 15 passenger van, so there's not enough room for all those stickers. Maybe the kickstarter will throw in a rolling billboard trailer?
With a vehicle like that, you need a mural of your family painted all the way around it.
 
We just got a call from the school counselor. My 8 yr old daughter and friends got a talking to because they made a penis out the wax from the outside of a piece of cheese. The counselor would not say penis on the phone. My wife had to ask if she meant a penis, because it wasn't clear. No part of this story is not hilarious to me. A grown woman won't say penis, and a bunch of third grade girls made a penis out of cheese wax. This is comedy gold.
I got a call from my school a few months ago, because my son won a game of scrabble during free time, using the word "necrophilia".

Don't ask me how he fit that word onto the board, since it's bigger than 7 letters. I mean, what was there before that let him play that word? The teacher was really aghast, but honestly, my first reaction was an involuntary laugh and the question "how many points was that worth?"

I had to explain to him that it wasn't a bad word, but the teacher was (and probably other kids' parents were) uncomfortable explaining what it meant to a child, so it was probably better to stay away from words (even technical or scientific ones) that had anything to do with genitals.
 
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