[Thread Game] Terrible Video Game Descriptions (MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS)

  • Be on a wagon
  • Fuck this, I didn't do shit, you ain't got nothin' on me
  • spend 90 minutes reconstructing your face, gender, and even species.
  • What was I doing again?
[DOUBLEPOST=1358119834][/DOUBLEPOST]
Bingo. Little easier on this one:
  • Giant robot in Alaska.

Sarah Palin's history of the world.
 

figmentPez

Staff member
Here's one I think very few people will get:
  • Wander around because you're too lazy to make a map
  • Get bored, order lemonade to start a bar fight
  • Repeat
I really hope someone had a similar childhood and does figure it out, though.
 

figmentPez

Staff member
I'm at a complete loss on this one
I imagine that few people ended up playing the game this way, and there were probably much better and more memorable events later in the game. I played this one on my friend's Commodore 64, only we weren't the brightest kids. I was like 11 at the time, and we just wanted to fight stuff, not solve puzzles or pay attention to dialog. One time we actually did manage to progress the story, and see more of the game beyond the starting town (we even got past the sewers to an overworld map!), but we lost the saved game because we didn't label the floppy discs we were using. Which left us with just bar fights again.[DOUBLEPOST=1358139564][/DOUBLEPOST]
Sly Cooper?
Nope, I've never played a Sly Cooper game. (*psst* Don't tell LittleKagsin )
 
Strike the earth!
OHMIGOD CARP!
OHMIGOD ELEPHANTS!
OHMIGOD WE'RE OUT OF BOOZE!
OHMIGOD A FIVE-WINGED DEMON MADE OUT OF VOMIT!
OHMIGOD A HORRIFIC ACCIDENT INVOLVING MAGMA!
Well that went rather well, actually.
 

BananaHands

Staff member
  • Everyone is a dick.
  • Gems turn people into monsters.
  • Seriously, what the fuck. Why is everyone a goddamn dick.
  • Wait, what is Cloud doing here?
 

BananaHands

Staff member
Final Fantasy Tact-dicks.[DOUBLEPOST=1358178068][/DOUBLEPOST]do... do you get it
  • Four friends in the city!
  • FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
  • UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
  • UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
  • UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
  • UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
  • Dude hates everything.
 
A potentially easy one...
  • Come a hero from the East
  • Free the man within the beast
  • Bring the child from out the band
  • Drive the curser from the land
 

GasBandit

Staff member
I got one for you guys. Old schoolers will pick this up immediately I'm sure:

"There I was in my P-51 at 10,000 feet when I was jumped by 5 ME-109s and 1 F-4 Phantom. The guys in those planes were good."
 
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